A
female
age
30-35,
*all3rbby
writes:Okay, over summer break I went on a vacation to another country, where I met a boy who we will call Carlos. He was basically my vacation boyfriend, and to be honest I did and still do have feelings for him. During our time together, we did hook up. It was much more than a hook up, we talking about everything and became good friends. Now we have each others numbers, and he texts me every so often. Most of the time it's him wanting me to send him pictures, or phone sex. Sometimes he'll just stop replying. He does have a girlfriend. He did when we hooked up, but he didn't tell me until the day he left. He said he was sorry, and he just wanted to make it the best vacation he could. He really doesn't seem like that kind of guy, but maybe that's just me wanting to believe he isn't. I can't help but hold on to the past, what we had even though I may never see him again. And it's probably stupid of me to think we had more than a hookup, am I just dragging it on? Should I say anything? Let it go? Stop talking to him? Thank you for all of your help.
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female
reader, Dear Mandy  +, writes (18 May 2011):
 Hi
I completely agree with CaringGuy here. This man said he wanted to make it the best vacation he could, and guess what? he did , for himself. Sending dirty pictures to a guy you have no knowledge about is a very risky and dangerous thing to be doing. Who knows what he is doing with these pictures your sending him. I would stop this now. He has a girlfreind and poor her! how do you think she is going to feel when she finds these texts and pictures? because she probally will find out. Put yourself in her shoes, how would you feel? I think you deserve SO much better than this perverted creep. How you must lack confidence in yourself to still want to have any contact with. You are worth so much more than this, you just need to believe in your self. For your sanity and heart, please forget about this looser and move on. I would not give him the time of day. I would delete his number and any messages, and even change my number so there would be no more confussion to him that you are not some peice of meat he can play around with. Whilst your wasting precious time on him, you are missing precious time with a man who would treat you right, and deserve your time.
I hope this has helped
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (18 May 2011):
Okay, look at the facts here.
1 - He had a girlfriend.
2 - He never told you about his girlfriend, so lied to you both and is continuing to lie and mock her.
3 - When he does text, all he really wants are dirty pictures and phone sex.
I'm afraid this is not the kind of guy you should be dating or even thinking about. He is exactly 'that kind of guy', and I think maybe you are burying your head in the ground a bit hoping he'll suddenly turn out to be a great guy.
He won't.
He's basically a liar and a cheat, and rather than spend time setting yourself up to get hurt, you should move on from him.
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A
female
reader, lovebug 1919 +, writes (18 May 2011):
tell carlos you ewant to remain friends but no more than that. any more and you will never get over him
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A
female
reader, Romanilove +, writes (18 May 2011):
Its hard to make these decisions when you have feelings for the person. My honest advice is to try to move on.
If he lives in another country it's a very difficult relationship to work out. He already lied to you from the very beginning. He was cheating on his gf with you. This is something he can do to you if you were to ever be in a relationship. Now when he contacts you it's all sexual... It doesnt seem like you want only this kind of phone relationship..
Dont answer the next time he texts you. If hes used to u answering all the time it may surprise him. But you still kno hes playing games.
You want a boyfriend that you can see and that loves you, because you deserve that! A foxy girl like you doesn't need to put up with this.
Learn in your young age, that you are the rule not the exception.
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