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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Hi,I'm wondering if it's weird to be basically an adult but just dated one guy for 2 months. I'm scared of the whole dating thing and feel uncomfortable with the fact that someone wants to be with me?I feel that because I am so against the whole relationship idea, I'm pushing people away. Is there any way for me to stop this? The thing is, while I was uncomfortable with the attention, I was also flattered that someone would try so hard to be with me (even though it didn't work out).I miss the closeness connection now, but I think it's going to take a long time before I want to feel another connection like that again. Is that normal?Thanks for your help! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (27 October 2009):
Is there something in your life that has caused you pain? I.E., have your own parents split up? People are usually scared to commit, and are scared of emotional closeness and relationships because they have been hurt in the past. The first step is to look at your life and identify an area where you have been hurt before. If there is something, then perhaps you should talk about it with someone so you can understand why you feel that way and try to face it. Give yourself time, and don;t think there's anything wrong with you. There are plenty of other people who have felt this way. You need to find out what it is that has caused you to be afraid of closeness, and try to understand it. Good luck.
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