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age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Who here keeps in contact with their exes and if so why?I personally don't and neither does my bf, but the situations are different. I simply drifted apart from my ex whilst he makes a point of not contacting her. He threw away al their pictures, changed his number and rarely speaks about her in a good way. Does this mean anything?
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female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (20 April 2010):
 I'm quite close with all of my exes. Two were some of my husband's groomsmen (and he didn't know them until he got to know me), and the rest are all good friends - and of course, came to the wedding. It helps that I didn't sleep with any of them, and that the break-ups were not drama filled. And, I only date chill, nice guys. Guys that I would otherwise be friends with. As for my fella, he didn't really maintain relationships with his exes, because some of them hurt him pretty badly and some of them moved away after college and just kind of drifted away into the wind. Also, my relationships were all long, his relationships were all pretty short (except for that one girl who burned him badly).
It sounds like your boyfriend was really hurt by this girl and doesn't want any reminders of her. If he threw out all the memories and changed numbers to avoid her, it must have been a pretty messy break-up and he clearly wants her as far away from his life as he can get her.
I wouldn't worry about it! Good luck, sweetness.
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female
reader, Not My Name  +, writes (20 April 2010):
 I see my ex (father of my son) every single day, and he sleeps at my house half the nights of the week. We get along as friends but I doubt we would be so friendly as to the extent of having purely platonic sleep overs if not for haing a child together.
This ex is also friends with the guy I lived with before him (X2), ... we have gone out socializing together, playing snooker, laser games, stuff like that, and even all sat in X2's mum's kitchen chatting with her. X2 is just a fun likeable guy.
Ex and current man don't know each other too well as yet, but enough they have given each other nick names and shared a laugh.
For the ex's part, ... his immediate ex was a psycho and I would fume if he had anthing to do with her, ... but as for his ex prior to that, ...she's lovely and we were the only non relatives invited to her wedding.
All happy campers for the most part.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHey thanks everyone for reply, I guess I knew the answer to my question but I just wanted peoples take on things and also to see how they felt about keeping in contact with their ex.
kc 100: thanks that helps, I guess its about how it ended and how the relationship was like. :-)
rambini: yes, it ended negatively and probably why, from someone whos relationship didn't really end that badly, it just seemed a bit excessive.
Cerebrus: My bf says the same, he sees no point in having friendships with exes as he feels its the best way to move forward and it also stops damage to the current relationship.
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female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (20 April 2010):
 I dont think it means anything that will have an impact on your relationship - it is clear that they ended badly and he doesnt want to be reminded of her, I imagine she may have hurt him quite badly hence he doesnt want to be reminded of that. But this is nothing to really worry about, some relationships end badly and there is a lot of hurt involved, and sometimes that never really goes away but it doesnt mean that they are still not over the ex that hurt them.
I personally have a mixed bag when it comes to my ex's - a few I would never dream of keeping in touch with and a few where it did end really badly and I dont want anything more to do with them. Whereas a couple of my ex's are now good friends of mine, they are people I still care about and we maintain a good friendship. I think this was not because of the way it ended (they both actually ended really badly) but because of the nature of the relationship - at the time they were my best friends, the relationships were fantastic and I think it would be sad to lose them from my life. The other ex's who treated me badly or where our relationship really didnt work - they are the people I dont want to keep in my life.
One of my ex's who I'm still friends with, we went through a lot together (his dad died and I would travel a few hundred miles every couple of weeks to see him, I even gave up my job at that time to be with him when he needed me) - while we didnt work as a couple I still care immensley about him and cant forget what we went through together so it is important to me to be friends still.
I think friendship with an ex is very subjective depending on the nature of the relationship that you had, and the way you broke up. And especially if one party still has feelings for the other - that never works!
Dont be worried by your boyfriends ex, the past is nothing to worry about really. Just focus on the future and treating each other well, enjoy your time together and make the most of each other. The past is in the past for a reason, there is no need to let it come back and affect the present.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionMy bf's ex stared talking to guys online, on a dating site. I think that really got to him and he said himself it was a pride thing. I think his was a relationship where he gave everything and ended up getting hurt.
As for me, my ex moved back to his country and we e-mailed and text but contact just slowly faded away.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2010): It depends on the situation with your ex, I personally don't keep in contact with any of them because I always cut contact when I break up with someone instead of holding onto them.
Some people just can't let go, others are able to maintain a stable loving friendship after their break up, generally speaking though if the relationship ended in a nice way then they'll still have good memories of that person and still have a bond with them.
Obviously his relationship with his ex ended in a way that he wanted to cut her completely out of his life and he's right to do so in that case, the best way to get over someone is to do that. It would be far worse if he still kept pictures of her and still spoke about her in a good way, most of the time that shows that the person is not completely over their ex.
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female
reader, rambini +, writes (20 April 2010):
 every relationship ends differently, his probably just ended acrimoniously. i keep in touch with some of my exes, but those which ended negatively i tend not to. it also depends on the ex in question. some of my ex's wanted to stay in contact more than others. usually it depends who does the dumping, if your bf got dumped by his ex he is more likely to hate her, or if she cheated on him (its a pride thing). but i wouldnt try to read anything into it, its just how life works. every person and every relationship is different. hope this helps! x
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2010): I keep in contact with my ex as we were best friends and still are, but it sounds like your bf's ex really hurt him
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