A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I'm 14 and there are 2 different girls that I like and have questions about. There is a 16 year old she has a car and she wants to have sex with me. Should I? But there is a 13 year old almost 14 and I really like her and she really likes me. We want to have sex but we are nervous and I would go far enough to say I'm in love with her, she says she's in love with me, so I'm confused which girl I should pick. Or who I want to have sex with. Can you help me pick who I really want? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all of your feed back guys, it really helped.
A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (10 September 2010):
 Why is it all about sex? It seems to me that you are just a horny 14 year old boy and dont care about either of these girls, you would happily use both of them if they would have sex with you. Stop thinking with your dick and realise that these are 2 girls with real feelings and you will end up hurting them both.
Basically if you are in love with the 13/14 year old girl then you would have blown off the 16 year old ages ago. If you love someone you would not even consider having sex with another person, so if you really love her like you say you do then tell the 16 year old you are with someone else and you dont want to have sex with her.
As for the 13/14 year old girl that you "love" - just date her and enjoy being together. Sex is a massive step up and you need to think very seriously about it. First of all this girl is younger than you therefore you could get into trouble for having sex with her, even though you are both under the legal age to have sex you are still older than her so it could be taken that you are forcing her into sex and you could get into trouble.
Secondly - pregnancy and contraception. Have you even thought about this? Having sex = babies, are you ready to be a dad? I bet the answer is NO! So you have to think about contraception, your girl will need to get birth control sorted out and then you will need to get some condoms to make sure you are 100% protected from pregnancy and STD's. But even condoms and birth control can fail so you have to be aware that an accident could happen and your girl could end up pregnant.
Then there is the emotional side to sex. It brings on a lot of emotions you wont have felt before, and it makes the two people who have had sex much much closer. This girl will become very attached to you, sex is often much more of an emotional thing for a girl so her feelings will be very strong for you after having sex - so unless you really love her and want a long term relationship with her then you will end up hurting her, and that is not what you want to do to a girl so young.
I know it seems like we are a bunch of boring old adults telling you that you are too young for sex - but there is a reason why we sound like a broken record! Teenagers often just are not ready for sex and convince themselves they are ready purely because their hormones are raging. But sex makes relationships complicated, and there are many negative outcomes that can happen which often teenagers are not ready for.
So my advice is this; if you really love your younger girl, then date her for a while and make sure you really do love her, trust her and respect her - and that she feels the same way for you too. Build a relationship and enjoy each other's company before you start involving sex, because you will only ever have a good first time experience of sex when you are in love and are comfortable with each other. Otherwise its just going to be embarassing, uncomfortable and awkward.
If you dont love her or want a relationship with her then it is best to leave her alone - dont take the virginity of a poor girl who you have no feelings for, she will regret it for the rest of her life and it will be your fault. And dont sleep with the 16 year old either, life isnt just about sex you know!
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2010): Stay away from the 13 yo girl. She is young, and having sex with her would be statutory rape. Do not take sexual advantage of the poor kid and just leave her alone. Otherwise you will spend looooong time in prison and would deserve it. Do NOT touch that kid indecently with your hands.
Emily
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A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (10 September 2010):
 Since your determined to have illegal sex...
Don't pick the 13year old, because you will mess up her life and hurt her badly, and she'll regret ever meeting you.
Pick the 16year old, she'll mess up your life instead. She's got a car, children like cars. If anything happens, she'll get in trouble, because she'll look perverted instead of you.
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A
male
reader, JamesBM +, writes (10 September 2010):
Agreed with tennisstar88, you ain't 'in love' man you have a crush, and you are too young to have sex. I know you get all pissed about it you wanna speed it up. Don't rush it! One little mistake would fuck up your days for the rest of your life. You ain't ready!
Who do you pick? Why the hell you asking us? They're your dates. You pick. And Cheers, good luck.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (10 September 2010):
 How about you wait to have sex, you're a little too young. At 14, you don't know anything about love, dear..you're just starting out in this dating world. I wonder why does a 16 year old want to have sex with someone who is 3 years younger, usually she picks one her age or older.
But ultimately you're going to do what you want. It sounds like you like the 13 year old more but I think that 13 is still too young to have sex (so is 16) but I would pick the 16 year old just for the fact she has a car because where else would you have sex, and that's all your after right now.
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