A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I been through a lot with my muslim boyfriend being a secret to his parents and where he lives it tool three years to introduce me because I broke up with him. I wish he could have did it sooner. While we was broken up I met a wonderful guy we have a very good chemistry he cause about my feeling all the time. But I know my muslim boyfriend loves me and I don't want to hurt him. But I feel he never cared about my feeling when I got an abortion. I never looked for anybody within our relationship but I got tired him not caring about my feelings. But now he introduced me and is doing everything he coulds to make it work but I don't feel the same for him i only made love to him once and it felt so weird I don't know what to do cause everytime I try to break up with him he cries and says he don't know what he woulds fdo without me but I can't leave the other guy alone cause I feel I could picture him in my future and I never was able to picture me ands my muslim boyfreind together raising kids because of our different beliefs. What should I do I'm so cofused this been going on for 7 months already and I can't do this anymore I don't want to hurt anybody
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abortion, broke up, muslim Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (9 February 2010):
 You need to be honest with the guy you don't want to be with and say it to him in plane english not with hints or signs. That way he can move on and in time he will get over you. Let him know you don't feel the same way as he does and that you are sorry if it hurts but its just the truth about how you feel.
A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (8 February 2010):
 Staying with anyone out of politeness because you do not want to hurt their feelings IS a form of hurting the other person as well as yourself, at the same time.
Never stay with someone long term out of fear of not wanting to hurt them.
I do not know if you should date the other person. What I do know is that if you only leave one person for another person, and not leave because it is time for you to leave, then THAT is the issue you need to put attention to when working on yourself.
-Frank
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A
male
reader, goodguy11 +, writes (8 February 2010):
I think you should do what feels right. If you don't want to be with him anymore then you should tell him. If he gets hurt so what who hasn't been hurt right? You might feel guilty but later on you'll feel better because it was the right thing to do. Get on with your life and he'll eventually move on. There's no easy way to break up so just be brave and do it. Don't be stuck in a relationship where one of you is unhappy. I know you care about his feelings but seriously don't do him any favors by sticking with him because your afraid to hurt him.
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