A
female
age
,
*aryB
writes:Just out of curiosity, if a woman breaks off an engagement to someone and states the reason as being- "I just want to be me and he doesn't", what exactly is she trying to say.Call it naive if you will, but does that statement pretty much mean she did the breaking up? The reason I'm asking is because my ex has resently ended his relationship with the girl he basically left me for. It's been a little over a yr. since he left me but, throughout this past yr. he has driven by my house and in the past sent me random txts. which I have ignored, all while being engaged to her. A few days ago, he once again sent me a txt. saying he's been thinking about me and then I hear they have broken up.There is no way I'm falling for that crap nor, do I have any intentions of hooking back up with him if that is what he has in mind. I'm basically, just curious what she means by her statement and if she is the one who did the breaking up or him. Your insight would be appreciated.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2011): In regards to what the male reader wrote - Why would someone want to be in a relationship with a person they feel they need to change? That seems like such a waste of time to me. As far as my ex is concerned, life with him was always all about him. When things went his way we got along fine but, after 7yrs. together I felt it was time, long overdue might I add, to start thinking about myself. That is when trouble with us started - we argued a lot towards the end and things went downhill from there. That is when he, unbeknownst to me, starting looking elsewhere. I guess this new gf isn't planning on being a fool like I was and for as long as I was, waiting around for things to be different with him because obviously, they never will be.
A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (25 July 2011):
 Yes she broke up with him. Its hard to say exactly what she meant without any context or being there to hear what really happened, but it sounds like she feels he is trying to change her, because she just wants to be herself whereas he wants her to be someone different.
Anyway, she definitely broke up with him and ended the relationship. Dont go near your ex - chances are he will be upset about the breakup and looking for a re-bound, and you are an easy target for him.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2011): she broke it off because he wants to change her and she wants to be herself. That also means he's not happy with her because he wants her to be someone else.
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