A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hii'm getting married next month and since i'm a virgin i asked my sisters for help.my eldest sister says that i should stop the intercourse after i lose my virginty immediately, otherwise i will damage my vagina.but my other sister says it's ok to continue.they are both married, i don't know who to follow.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for your help friends, can i go to a doctor and check for such a thing? i mean can doctors tell?
also noticed that you mentioned lubes, r they necessary on the first time? cuz i don't like to use them.
A
female
reader, Umari Solanthus  +, writes (10 July 2008):
 I think your eldest sister is teasing you a little--it is perfectly okay to continue (though I am one to talk, being a virgin myself).
Considering it is your first time it would be best to take it easy, but I doubt you would damage yourself. Plenty of people carry on.
Equally, if you are nervous, you could always do some research and find out a little more, just to reassure yourself. And, like Smiles just said, contact someone here or someone you know who is experienced, and talk about it. It will ease your worries.
Congratulations on your upcoming marriage.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2008): That's a new one to me... that you have to stop immediately because it damages your vagina.
Now, the one about being ok to continue... that sounds more familiar.
As far as I understand, it's ok to continue, just as long as YOU feel comfortable enough to. If you're relaxed and lubricated, then it's ok to continue, just don't expect fireworks. However, if it hurts too much, it's ok to stop and try some other time, when you're ready.
When I lost my virginity, I was relaxed and lubricated. It hurt at first when he just entered, but then, it didn't hurt and I felt comfortable for the rest of the intercourse. He was very gentle, patient and loving so that's what made it a great experience for me.
However, some girls bleed, and some even bleed for hours after the intercourse is over. Bleeding is quite common, though. But so is not bleeding! (I think I once read that 48% of girls bleed, and 52% don't).
But you waited until marriage. Good! This guarantees that you're already in a loving, secure relationship and that it'll be special. So you'll probably be relaxed and ready! If you're not so sure, buy some lube, and spend PLENTY of time on foreplay. Go slowly and sensually.
Good luck with your wedding! ;)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2008): Vow, I am so sorry to hear that your sisters are confusing you like this; but your eldest sister is either playing a prank on you or needs some sex education herself;
I think you can go with the advise of the other sister;
HOWEVER
I do suggest, you do get some prooep information on sexual intercourse and more spesific the first time;
I cannot post to much info on this site; it will not be approriate;
BUT
you are welcome to send me a private message and I will forward more info to you;
Best wishes; lost of hugs and "smiles";
Stop stressing; you need to RELAX;
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2008): Damage your vagina? In what way? That's the weirdest thing I've ever heard. I don't know anyone who's stopped immediately after first pentration when they lose their virginity, and they have healthy kids now. I myself let it play out till we were done, and my vagina is fine as far as I know!
If you are still worried anything pertaining to sex, I suggest you talk to a nurse, or someone at your local sexual heath clinic instead of trying to sort out what your sisters are talking about.
Congratulations on your marriage and saving yourself for your husband. That is a rare and wonderful thing! Enjoy your special night and just relax!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2008): I'm not having sex right now and plan to keep it that way,but as many questions and answers as I've read,I'd sayit's perfectly ok to have sex every once in a while,or more than once.
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A
female
reader, SugarCookie +, writes (10 July 2008):
After he first goes in have him stop inside you until the pain stops then have him continue to go slowly until all the pain stops then you are good to go. The only intercourse that can mess up your vagina is if he is like 4 inches wide and 13 inches long then you might rip or rape of course can cause a lot of damage!I hope that helped!
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