A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:where did i go wrong? should i give him time or just move on?I recently start dating this guy, we get on really well. I felt that we know each other for sometime. We went for a drink then decide to go back to mine and watch a DVD. I suggested on the way for him to get a toothbrush just in case he stay the night because it was late. Later on he kissed me and i reciprocate. Never in my wildest dreams i wanted us to have sex that night because we were still getting to know each other. I said to him, he are not having sex but please stay the night. We had a debate and he left. However, before he left i begged him to stay - looking back i think i behaved like a child in my pleads. I have called in on several occasions to discuss the sitaution but he never respond. Finally, on the third day after the sitaution he answered my call. He said, i have bugged him out and he thinks it is best we do not see each other again. I have apology again and tried to explain but he wasn't having it. My defense in all honest i just wanted to talk about the sitaution but he was blanking me. Should i give him time or just move on?
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female
reader, Stayc63088  +, writes (10 May 2008):
 Move on. He isn't taking your calls and told you you freaked him out basically. Also you did say he wants nothing to do with your apology. Just let it go. Trying to keep talking to him makes you seem desperate and you apologized so you can let it go now. Next time don't beg! Like the first poster said being "needy" turns a man off, and fast. Let things happen. If he wants to go let him go. Be independent. We all make this mistake at one time or another and you just learn from it. You don't have to act like you don't care but say what you have to say, one time, and if he still wants to go then let him go. Asking over and over does nothing but make you seem desperate and push him away further. Remember this in the future and good luck! Forget this guy.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2008): I think you need to move on and not attempt to patch things up with him. Apparently he couldn't accept the no sex thing, and for you, your better off I think.
At your age, one would think this would have been a no brainer and easily acceptable ... apparently he wasn't mature enough. Sorry young lady it didn't work out better.
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A
female
reader, kirstylou +, writes (9 May 2008):
 Hi Hun
my best advice for you is to not contact him, give him some space and if he wants to get in touch with you, he'll phone or text you. If he dont then you will know he has moved on.
take care x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2008): Move on and learn from your experience.
Your behaviour appeared 'needy' to him! That is not a way to start off a relationship. In all honesty, that would scare me too. As women we often lose ourselves; we mold ourselves around the men in our lives and we shouldnt do this. He may already know this and this might not be what he is looking for. You need to be independent! Let things happen without childish begging.
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