A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So my girlfriend and I have been dating for a while now and I feel like I have been putting a lot of effort into this relationship and I feel like she doesn't put too much into our relationship. I give her a lot of attention, and yet I don't get a lot back... Like I love her, but I don't have the "crush" I had on her when I first started dating her and I really want to like her too, not only love her. She just doesn't give me attention and every time I make an effort to flirt, she'll just be like "ooh". I'll say something like "i love you babe, i really do" or "i'll love you forever" and she'll respond with "love you too," and it seems like she doesn't really mean it. I'm not trying to be a baby and complain, but this is really how I feel. In the hallways at school, it feels like she pushes me away from her and I don't like it at all, it bothers me so much. I'm starting to get a feeling that she doesn't like me, even though she says she does. Another problem that I have is that I get jealous very easily. She'll bring up another guy, and I'll get mad because the guy is getting more attention from my girlfriend than I do. A lot of the time I don't really feel like her boyfriend, I just feel like I'm there. I only feel like I'm her boyfriend when we hang out by ourselves, not around other people. It's just everytime I try to talk to her about it, it ends up in an argument and one of us gets sad/disappointed.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2010): I think you should just be friends with her. The reason why I say this is because, she is not showing you the love and attention you asked for. If she loved you she would want to make you happy. Keep things simple. You should find yourself another woman to date and leave this woman alone. Do not ask her to be friend just do it be friends with her and not close friends.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2010): It sounds like she is taking you for granted and that she just isn't that into you or the the relationship with you. I wish I had a guy who showed me with his actions how much he cared about me. Jealousy has nothing to do with how she is acting towards you....it has more to do with how she really feels about you. She knows you are probably a great guy, but feels bad because, she doesn't feel as intense about you and you feel about her. I think she is going to end up really breaking your heart in the future......I could be wrong, but that is just my opinion on the matter because, I have been through this sort of thing before.
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A
female
reader, pancakes rule  +, writes (4 May 2010):
 It's difficult to tell. She might just be used to you, like, past the stage of being infatuated and needing to be with you all the time but still loves you.
Maybe she feels that she isn't getting enough space.
If you have one night a week to go out together and then the rest of the time just chill with your own friends or do whatever.
Although I'm not suggesting that you only ever see her once a week, you can go out other times as well.
It might make her appriciate you more, or if she doesn't like you as much anymore then it can show that too and you'll have your answer.
good luck
xx
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A
female
reader, Rositak25  +, writes (4 May 2010):
 well first of all hi ..
and well i had a boyfriend who was just like you who gave so much attention to me he did everything her can to gt my attention and surprise me and stuff&& at first it was real cute but then he started pushing it a little to much where to the point that i got annoying and wasn't cute at all anymore
i just felt like i need a little space to breathe and when she says she loves you she may mean it but maybe she isn't all that great in expressing her feelings
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (4 May 2010):
 This sounds one sided to me. Don't say I love yous anymore and test her tone of voice when she responds. Maybe your insecurity is turning her off. She's not that vocal when it comes to expressing herself. What she needs is space. Maybe she's a more socialable person than you are, and you have to consider if this incompatability would hurt you in the long run.
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