A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Simple question: how do you know when a guy just wants to get in your pants? What are the sure fire signs? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2010): There are a number of signs but they're not necessarily signs either, just because a guy doesn't do any of these things doesn't mean he isn't just after sex.
Talks about sex a lot, very often disguised as jokes.
Brings sex up early in the relationship.
Keeps trying to get you alone somewhere you can be intimate.
Is impatient about sex, moans or gets too disappointed when refused it.
Doesn't try to connect on an emotional level. (this is the most concrete sign)
Gets very handsy and persistent in his attempts to grope when alone.
When handsy and after stopping his hands he keeps trying then that's a pretty good sign.
When a guy has to use a line like "I just can't help myself you're just so sexy" to excuse overbearing sexual advances he's only after sex.
Some guys are very good at this game though, they will be patient and play a very caring, thoughtful game. With these guys the only way you will know is to trust your gut. Seriously if you get a "too good to be true" feeling, if you're with a guy and you just can't shake off the feeling that he is acting too perfectly, trying too hard to impress, be wary.
The best way to find out though is finding out about his past. If he was a player in his past then it's safe to assume he still is. Yes people can change but players rarely do. If you have no way of finding out about his past from others, no way of finding out his reputation then you will find out is by testing him. A guy only interested in sex will always try and insist on getting you alone, that's pretty normal really, but for a player his patience will run out and he'll get more and more insistent or he'll start to go cold.
A month is usually a good amount of time to test a guys resolve when it comes to that, but it's only really useful if you already have a feeling that's all he wants.
Above all though, trust your friends, they will see things in him that you won't if they say he's only interested in sex trust them. If he makes excuses not to see or socialize with your friends then that too is a red flag.
In summary guys who are only after sex, will try to keep themselves as emotionally detached as possible while getting you emotionally attached to them, they won't really want to go out with you and your friends because it's easier to play the game without an audience.
There are no real perfect signs, the most important thing as with anything in life is to trust your gut, your intuition. It knows things you will never consciously pick up on.
A
female
reader, dearkelja  +, writes (2 October 2010):
 He moves too quickly with the physical part of your relationship.
He doesn't take the time to get to know you. IE: He doesn't ask you things about yourself (like when is your birthday.)
You tell him when your birthday is and he can't even remember the month.
He asks for sex on the first date, the second date or the third date or when you don't feel like you have a "connection". He asks for sex and you tell him no and he keeps on bringing it up.
Your dates consist of "hooking up" and not doing things together that help to bond a relationship like movies, dinner, fairs and other outings.
He doesn't introduce you to his friends, his family, or generally doesn't seem proud of the relationship.
He doesn't care about you enough to walk you to your door, your car, etc after seeing you.
Finally, if you do have sex and then his behavior towards you becomes distant, or he doesn't call, etc.
Hope this helps and guys, the same (except for door thing) applies to you.
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A
female
reader, FluffyPie +, writes (2 October 2010):
 For starters, ALL men want to get into a woman's pants. There are just 2 types of them - those who have sex and use you for that and those who want to develop this relationship on a higher level, in order to set with you. Now listen up:
When he's hinting with conversations with sexual meaning, trying to talk you into intimate circumstances (over his house) etc, even if you've been dating for 2 weeks (let's say), he sure wants to get into your pants.
BUT these signs can also be misleading, since not everyone is mischievous and just using you for sex.
Now:
Touching/Stroking you down there or your breasts, is a clear sign that he wants to get in your pants really bad, we all know that, they're men, for Christ's sake! But when all these signs are supplemented with love gestures, actions that make you feel loved and SECURE - he cares about you, he's interested in what you do, in your daily activities, he shows interest, no matter how meaningful they sound, he wants a strong emotional and psychical bound with you. He just wants to add sex up to your relationship.
So, if you feel like he's dating you and all he does is talking about sex and "it's time for intimacy", if you feel like he's only living to "score", you should move on.
It also depends on how you see things, it depends on the perspective: if you're being over cautious, you might think that ALL men want to get into your pants. Well, they DO. Just not all of them are well-meaning. In such cases you have to take the risk of finding out before it's too late.
Good luck!
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (2 October 2010):
 He probably would not look into your eyes as deeply, he would also try to touch you alot (That isn't a sure thing though)...That is all I can think of at any rate. The truth is, some people are magnificent at disguising their true intentions so you can never truly tell. Even the things I stated may not apply to everyone. Some people may not look deeply into your eyes because they are emotionally unstable...
I hope that helps.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2010): watch out for booze...if he invites u to drink...be very very cautious. Men rely on that so much its really sad. Then again if I did that maybe id be in a better position with women as far as experience goes lol. No, but seriously, watch for invites to bars clubs...anything thats not a group setting especially. Good luck.
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