A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My ex fiancee is the father of my child. His latest gf he met online and after meeting her a couple of times in person he introduced her to our son without even consulting me first. He took photos of her with our son and she put them up as her facebook profile pic. She also created a "family tree" which included her, my ex and OUR son and called it "my little family". Keep in mind, she has only ever met my son that one time. My ex also wanted her to move in with him right away and she moved away from all her family and friends to be with some guy she barely knew. Before they'd even met in person, she talked about marrying him and having kids on facebook for everyone to see.Why on earth is my ex letting this weirdo cross the line of appropriateness? And what is wrong with this girl?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2009): Thanks guys for your input! When I first saw the pictures, I sent her a message and asked her to take it down because it was not appropriate and she refused saying "I didn't think I needed your permission". I asked the privacy department of facebook to remove them and they were very obliging. However she has continued to put them back up a few times. I've spoken to my ex about all this and his answer was "she can do whatever she pleases" and then he uploaded the photos onto his myspace and left a message for me saying "take a look at this, enjoy :)". So, I'm definitely dealing with two very immature and spiteful people. Obviously she's not all there but for my ex to go along with this garbage and not think of our son, well that's just shameful. Oh well. I'll just be happy in the knowledge that I'm the mother and no amount of fake family trees is going to change that.
A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (17 August 2009):
 I think you need to voice your concerns to your ex - he is totally in the wrong for introducing your child to her without speaking to you first.
Explain that while you are happy for them to get along, at the end of the day she cannot just make a new family with your son. Tell him that you are not happy for her to have the picture up on Facebook and the family tree thing is just too weird, and you need him to speak to her. If he wont speak to her then you might have to do it yourself - I think before she really gets involved in your child's life it might be best to meet her to see what she is really like.
It seems like she is trying to play happy families with your son and your ex is going along with it all. It is your ex's choice if he wants to live with her etc and it is his personal life so you cant do much about that. But wherever your son is involved, you have the right to know about it and to have final say over what happens. It is his duty as a father to put his son first above some woman he has only known for a short time - and letting your son meet this woman so quickly is very irresponsible.
I think you need to have a good talk with him about this situation - he might think you are just jealous but you do need to stress to him that he is making decisions about your child without you, and that is wrong. Hopefully he will listen and try and slow things down a bit with this woman!
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
male
reader, GrimmReality  +, writes (17 August 2009):
 OUCH!
That Facebook, I tell ya people do some really stupid things over there,
So how long have you and your Ex been apart? sopunds to me like this new girl in his life is trying to "stick it to ya". Kind of rubbing this in your face.
From what you describe, sounds like she has a problem with reality. Unfortunately, many people do. Social sites bring out the very worst in people as well. That is why more and more employers are checking Facebook Pages and Myspace accounts of a prospective hire to see if they have photos of themselves with a joint hanging out of their mouth or half naked with a camera in the bathroom mirror.
Pretty tactless on her part. Reprehensible on his part.
I think you better have a little talk with your ex about this. I think he needs to be reminded the child is YOURS and not HERS!
"My little family"? sounds more like "My lost grip on reality"!
Im so very sorry that happened to you. I have no children but I can only imagine how horrible that must seem to a parent.
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