A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am in a relationship with a wonderful man who I love and he loves me. We are very happy however I am "the other woman", even though our relationship is serious and we've been together for like 3 years, because he's cheated on his current/previous partner does that mean he'll cheat on me? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2017): Stay as the other woman, or move on, but if you do manage to become "the woman", realize that he will have an "other woman" and he won't tell you about her.
He will have another woman on the side, while you're waiting at home. He will be having fun with her, just like he's having fun with you while his main woman is at home.
He'll be having all kinds of fun with her, while telling her what a stick in the mud you are. You'll be sitting at home, wondering why he's working so much, and why he's so tired.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (5 September 2017):
 This is not a serious relationship, surely you can see that? How can it be serious when you are only a bit on the side? You have waited for three years for this guy, are you willing to keep waiting while he goes home to his girlfriends bed at night?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2017): He is already cheating on you every time he goes home ..3 yrs is along time to be abit on the side
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2017): Well, since he's a young guy I presume, and has a girlfriend and not a wife, what would stop him from being with you? He is not married, is he?If he was old and married, then it might be a lot harder for him to cheat due to his age and status but a young guy would have a higher sex drive, more stamina and more opportunities to cheat.Either way, it has to be hard to live with the constant thought of "will he cheat on me?" Cause he is already damaged goods. And that's what you chose. As wonderful as he appears and as happy as you claim to be, it will never be a decent, solid and happy relationship for you. You are here trying to convince yourself he won't cheat on you too. But, you will always worry. It doesn't matter if he will or won't. You will always worry that your days are numbered and worry about every woman he locks eyes with just a little bit longer. Etc. You will never feel loved because being loved means trusting your man and feeling safe with him. You will never feel safe with him and this will slowly tear you apart from the inside out. Because he has the ability to cheat. He is already doing it with you. He is CAPABLE of doing it again if the right opportunity comes around.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (4 September 2017):
 Quite possibly.
But not because " once a cheater, always a cheater " ( although, as another poster mentions, there are studies supporting this theory ).
Just because he's not that into you. He does not like you THAT much. Sooner or later, your entertainment will decrease and he will be ready for something new.
How do I know ?. Simple- if he had liked you / loved you perceptibly more than the other girlfriend, he would have left HER to be openly with you , and that would not even have been a sacrifice for him, he just he would not have wanted it any other way.
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A
female
reader, holeymoley  +, writes (4 September 2017):
 Your future with this man is your 'today'. Whats going to change tomorrow that hasn't in the 3 years of being cheated on by him- yes, even though you are the other woman he is still cheating only difference is you know about it. Having your cake and eat it too, eventually leads to heart disease, just not the type you expect
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (4 September 2017):
 What future?
You're deluded if you think you have one.
Why does he still have a GF if you mean so much to him? Give your head a wobble. He's sticking around for the non comittal sex.
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A
female
reader, NORA B +, writes (3 September 2017):
Just ask yourself the question...How could you be in a relationship with this guy...WHEN...you are The Other woman.If you think you are...you must be dreaming.Yes he will cheat on you ...because that is just what he is good at....you are not the first and will not be the last.He is telling you all the things he feels will make you happy..and it seems to be working.O k if you are so sure that he is so wonderful and in-love with you .Give him a CHOICE.....You or the woman he goes home to every night.I feel for you ...You will wake up with his answer and see him as he is.Why waste your time on someone who is a cheater and has no idea of real love.Make new friends and meet some honest decent guy who will respect and love you only.Kind regards NORA B.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2017): Like I see it, that is one teeny study. I could site studies which claim the contrary: "Once a cheater, always a cheater? Maybe not."
OP, read those too before making up your mind.
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A
female
reader, like I see it  +, writes (3 September 2017):
 "Because he's cheated on his current/previous partner does that mean he'll cheat on me?"
Quite possibly.
Backed up by science! Literally just read a study about this yesterday: http://www.ajc.com/news/world/once-cheater-always-cheater-new-infidelity-study-says-yes/AZkFj5DXAXuK9XwuSySPrI
If you want a faithful partner, you should probably start by looking for one who doesn't already have a history of stepping outside his relationship when someone new catches his eye. Sorry :(
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2017): He may NEVER cheat on you.Obviously he wasn't very happy with his current relationship, or he wouldn't be with you.Just cause he is cheating with you, does NOT automatically mean he will cheat ON you, despite the opinions of many crystal ball holders on DC.Guys who cheat one time or for the first time never cheated before. There is a difference between a one time cheater and serial cheaters. Google cheaters on the net and you will find a multitude of cheating types. You can never predict the individual actions of any one man based on Google, generalizations, and what people say. Any of them could be wrong. People are always quick to jump on cheaters as vile human beings who are out to fuck everything in their path. But there are individual circumstances that drive people to cheat. Good people cheat. Decent people cheat. We are all vulnerable to temptation at the right time, in the right place and with the right person.For those who are not addicted to cheating for thrills or ego, it could simply be a lack of sex or disconnect in their current relationship. Some people remain in ho hum relationships because of duty, length of time, finances, obligation, kids, etc. They are afraid of change and upheaval in their lives. The easiest solution is being happy with someone else while keeping the appearances of their primary relationship entact. So, having the best of 2 worlds. Having their needs met by 2 different women.It's your call what the future holds. Not his.Are you happy? If so, then stay. But just know that it does get harder the longer you stay with him. Cause the longer you stay, the deeper you will fall in love with him. While he likely remains in both relationships, not wanting to change a thing.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123 +, writes (3 September 2017):
 Of course he could cheat on you... If he hasn't or isn't cheating already! Do you really think that this catch of a man is committed to you? He's a liar without any scruples and you actually think you're something special to him? You seem to be in severe denial to think that he loves you! Grow up dear. If he was that much in love with you then YOU would be the only person in his life, in a position of respect. You're nothing to him but a dirty secret.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (3 September 2017):
 There are no guarantees in life.
BUT if he has cheated on her for a longer period of time why would you think he won't do it to you?
Are you more special than the GF?
If he fell for you why didn't he JUST break up with her BEFORE starting something with you?
Maybe he is the kind of guy who wants to make SURE he has a GF so before leaving one he lines up the next one thus never be alone...
Or maybe he is/was just a tad immature and didn't think long term about cheating. He might have learned his lesson, he might not.
There ARE no guarentees. He might be the most faithful person from now on, he might be a serial cheater in progress...
How did he feel about cheating on her? Have you two talked about cheating and what you think of it? Is he worried YOU might cheat as well?
Because let's face it... you are almost as LIKELY as he is to cheat. Anyone can cheat. IT is a choice, just like CHOOSING to "date" a guy with a GF.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2017): Oh my good lord... that just about covers it all really.
The simple answer is yes he will cheat on you... he is cheating on his actions al partner. You aren't in a relationship with him in the manner you appear to be implying. He's a 'wonderful man' and apparently you love each other. Yet he is with another woman who he's goes home to at night...
Is this a serious question or are you a troll... I suspect the latter. If you are serious, then you are deluded... sorry
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