A
male
age
36-40,
*olidus
writes:Okay, so about 2 weeks ago I'm in the grocery store and this girl is checking me out. It occurs to me to hit on her, but I ultimately don't. On my walk home, the same girl pulls up beside me and starts chatting me up. She tells me I'm perfect, cute and funny, that she never hits on men like this, etc We exchange numbers and during our hug she almost molests me in the street. No problem with any of that. So, we've been talking on the phone, she's even called me on her lunch break, sometimes but she has this annoying habit of flaking out on our dates. Wednesday she calls me up, exclaiming how badly she wants to see me and asks if im busy that night. Invites me to a burlesque show. I say sure and she's supposed to text me later. Ultimately she flakes out of that as well. Now I've texted her and called since then and I haven't heard from her since Wednesday. What's the deal with ALWAYS Calling me and making plans and then not going through with them? Furthermore, why haven't I heard from her since wednesday? Is she blowing me off after going through all the trouble of getting my number and blatantly flirting with me over the phone for 2 weeks? I'm used to being blown off, but not being so fiercely pursued beforehand. Can someone please, help me out and give me some insight into whats going on in this girls head and what i should do?
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female
reader, Daisy_Daisy  +, writes (26 September 2013):
 Unfortunately I'm leaning towards her being 'too busy' to phone you tomorrow night. Have fun at the party either way!
A
male
reader, Solidus +, writes (26 September 2013):
Solidus is verified as being by the original poster of the question I was curious to see if she was blowing me off so I texted her one final time on monday inviting her to a big party this weekend just to see if she'd reply and she just responded 3 days later saying "Hey love, I haven't forgot about you just very crazy intense work week. I'll give you a ring tomorrow"I haven't decided whether or not I'm going to answer should she call. Though honestly I'm leaning toward ignoring it.
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A
female
reader, R1 +, writes (25 September 2013):
 Do you know that she definitely doesn't have a boyfriend or a recent ex?? This sounds like the behaviour of someone who wants to prove to themselves they are still attractive to other men but aren't ready to date one... I'm sure we've all been there!
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A
male
reader, GentleGiant  +, writes (24 September 2013):
There is no big deal here my friend she is just being her good old self. And your lucky that you experienced this before getting into a relationship with her. So she almost molests you and promises the big date. Ya right, if you believe that i have some property on the moon i want to sell you. Come on, this woman is so full of herself that she has probably numerous other male companions and friends she is entertaining at her place on a regular basis. She is going full speed ahead and be thankful your not in the equation. This woman is definitely playing with dynamite. Just forget her and the next time she approaches you know what you have to do. Good-luck..
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A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy +, writes (23 September 2013):
Again, I don't know what is going on in her head, but if she was really that keen on going on a date she wouldn't stay in the gym til 10pm.
When her spontaneity becomes unreliability, it's not a good thing! It's actually quite disrespectful of her to keep cancelling dates, and arrogant to assume you still want to see her after she's done this a few times.
Shame when she seemed so keen and you like her, but yeah she sounds more trouble than she's worth.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2013): I don't know what's going on with her, but I can't handle people like her. I have a friend like this who never knows what she is going to do until the last minute. I just stopped making dates with her, and we see each other only when someone else is going. Just stop answering her, or tell her what you told us. May be this will make her think.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2013): I think she is a bit flaky all around. She is obviously chasing you and then flakes out at the last minute.
Sounds like a guy to me.
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A
male
reader, Solidus +, writes (23 September 2013):
Solidus is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe haven't gone out on a date yet. She always suggests the days we should meet up then we don't. From what she's told me she has a busy life (5:30 am dance class, managing her own business, gym, etc) but I find it hard to believe she's that busy. She told me she's not good with sticking to plans and likes to be spontaneous, evident when she surprised me and called me a day before we were scheduled to hang out because she "Really wanted to see me" but then was too tired from the gym which she left after 10 pm. Also, from what she's told me she lives in my neighborhood a couple blocks away. So, she's not an outrageous distance away or anything and us getting together really shouldn't be this hard. I think it's a shame, because she's gorgeous and I like her a lot, but I think you're right about the not calling or texting her thing.
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A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy +, writes (23 September 2013):
I'm afraid I can't help with what's going on in her head but agree that it's confusing. Have you actually been on a date with her, or is it all calls/ texts? Maybe she enjoys chasing but isn't so keen on actually dating.. who knows. Weird unless she's had good reasons to cancel the dates that have been arranged.
What you should do: stop calling and texting, for one thing. I don't think you should give her any more chances to flake out unless she can give you good reasons why she cancelled the previous dates and prove to be more reliable.
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A
male
reader, SensitiveBloke +, writes (23 September 2013):
 This woman has only met you briefly once and is already inviting you to burlesque shows? She sounds nuts. Nothing about her behaviour seems normal.
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