A
female
age
30-35,
*oseyPants89
writes:My best friend is a male, and I'm a female. Everywhere we go, people think we're a couple and that's why I think it's hard for me to get a boyfriend or even go on a date because I find it hard to approach guys because I've been in this situation for two years now. Recently, he's bagged himself a girlfriend, which I'm happy for him, but also confused. A month earlier, we had this talk together that he was gonna come out as gay last year, but yet he's in a relationship with this girl now. Also, so looks a bit like me. He's told me before that he fancied the pants off me, but I didn't feel that way about him, so we never crossed that line.Anyway, I'm confused about the whole situation. Is he only with this girl to prove he's straight now? Is he trying to make me jealous because he has a girlfriend? Am I just being too picky on the whole situation and being jealous that someone's after taking my best friend from me?
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best friend, has a girlfriend, jealous Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2016): @myan
I always thought he was either gay or bi.. I think he's bi, but maybe that's me.. He's told me he's had sex with a bloke too, so maybe that's why it's playing on my mind.. My mam thinks I'm jealous, but I just don't want my best friend, who helped me through thick and thin, to just vanish like.. I'm scared, jealous and happy.
He didn't even tell me he was seeing her either, so I was shocked when he told me he had a girlfriend..
A
female
reader, fishdish  +, writes (10 June 2016):
 Kinda late in the game for him not to know his sexuality, in this day and age. Maybe he's bi.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (9 June 2016):
 You think you are confused, but what about HIM? First he fancied the pants off you, but you weren't interested, then he says he is going to come out as gay and now he is dating a woman .... seems he can't make up his mind if he is Arthur or Martha!
But seriously, think about the past two years, you don't get any nibbles because people think you and your best friend are a couple, he wanted a nibble but you wouldn't be nibbled, then he threw a big gay red herring into the mix and still no nibbles so now he went out found somebody that was happy and he is getting a nibble.
Maybe your best friend got sick of the same ole same ole life he was having and decided to make some changes in his life, to get it moving along so to speak, because from what you wrote the pair of you were stagnating somewhat.
You didn't want him, so he has found somebody who does. Good for him I say, and so should you, and you should also thank him, because through his moving on and getting a girlfriend should motivate you to make a few changes as well. He has opened a few doors for you, no longer will people thing you and he are a couple, and it will soon be known you are available for dates and a relationship.
So acknowledge his new status, "in a relationship" will man that he wont be spending so much time with you, wish his well and get moving through the newly opened doorway. Go on, you can do it!
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A
male
reader, Myau  +, writes (9 June 2016):
 He might have just been confused about who he was.
But I would say he isnt gay.
As for you, I think you are a little jealous and its time you went out and met a guy of your own.
Your friend will still be your friend and now you can double date.
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