A
female
age
36-40,
*_maldita
writes: What would you do if there is this pretty young girl chasing over your boyfriend??? To make things worst they live in nearby place and I'm miles apart from my boyfriend now... I'm clueless on what is going on since I'm in a very far away place right now and she is going to do whatever it takes to have him but my bf says he would never want to be with this girl... She tells everyone that my bf is showing signs of him liking her and that he was the one visiting her at home. From what I know she was the one doing it for him... Should I believe my bf that he is totally not in with this girl or should I follow my instincts and believe that there is something between them??? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, a_maldita +, writes (27 June 2011):
a_maldita is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes I know I should trust him more... This girl just taking advantage of the situation that we are in right now. It was funny since my bf knew her first before he even met me but still never took the opportunity to ask her out... I think there is something with this girl that my bf didn't like about! But still keeps on making me stressed sometimes.. Everytime we argue about her he would always tell me that I am way far better than that girl. I'm very pretty as what he said and very smart so need not to worry about anything... I'm trying to hold on to his words after all he never showed me signs of unfaithfulness... Thank so much for the advices its well appreciated....
A
female
reader, LizBetty +, writes (26 June 2011):
For the girl to be pretty doesn't mean she will take your guy away from you. My advice is for you to trust and believe your guy cause being pretty doesn't matter. Just try to trust him and move on instead of being suspicious.
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A
male
reader, mrg123 +, writes (26 June 2011):
This is a tricky one. Normally i'd argue for your instincts but you have to be mindful of the fact that your instincts can be coloured by your own emotions like, for example, fear, which is one of the classic ones which does cloud and in some ways inform our instincts.
The thing in this situation is you have to go on what you *know*; what you *assume* to be true could well be but can you prove it? If you can't prove it then your grounds for making accusations are pretty limited to be honest. You say, for example;
"She tells everyone that my bf is showing signs of him liking her and that he was the one visiting her at home.From what I know she was the one doing it for him."
Lets think about this. She has a vested interest in saying what she does because she wants him. It's also true that if what you know is based on your boyfriends word he has a vested interest too *but* even so he is your partner so his word should carry more weight. And if what you know is based on other evidence that reinforces the point that you should go with what you know and on this trust your boyfriend. Be weary of playing her game, she wants you to think he could be cheating because he wants you to split and have him for herself.
I am gonna go ahead and say that unless you have better concrete reasons to not too you should trust your reasons over your instincts until he gives you reason not too, ie, his behaviour is by an objective measure different, or you find something that casts doubt on his story. I dont think the distance is helping either, I hope that this is something that is temporary? In any case, trust your bf for now....Good luck :)xx
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