A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:what are some creative, thoughtful ways to propose to your girlfriend? i know it sounds terrible that i'm having to ask, but i've just never been very good at this sort of thing. i try so hard and love her very much. i just want to make this memorable for her and make her feel truly loved because she is. and i'm slightly romantically-challenged.nothing cliche like in the middle of a restaurant or anywhere in public. other than that, anything is fair game. ladies, what's your dream proposal? please help! Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2011): I would say stay away from anything cheesy or cliched. I personally would hate that and find it embarrassing and pressurised if it was in public. Honestly? My dream proposal would be in bed after spending the day together, (and some great sex) not anything particularly special, just going for a coffee and a walk somewhere nice, do something she likes doing, maybe cooking for her in the evening, it wouldn't even matter if it was beans on toast! Its the thought that counts.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (11 May 2011):
 I guess this depends on where she is from and what sort of style people are proposed to in that area.
Ask her mother or her best friend. Yes, they will most likely spread the rumours.... but they will only spread the rumour on to her if they think she will enjoy it, and so her anticipation will build up and that can be a good thing. Besides, when you ask them you might get some good ideas, just remember to go with what YOU feel is best, and not copy an idea from her mother of best friend. You have to make a twist of your own to it.
As far as I've seen it, girls from the USA want it big and fabulous, something they can brag about to their friends. You need the ring ready (which you could also need the help of her best friend with picking out). You also need to drop down on your knee at one point. Being alone in private helps, and while she is dolled up in a nice outfit too, not while she's doing laundry.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2011): Whatever you do, do not propose to her in public like at a sports game on the jumbotron...that creates pressure for her and makes a lot of anxiety I read. Have it be something between you and her, linked, as one Aunt stated. What are her hobbies? Whats her job? Look pal if your heart is with her, you wont fail. Youll figure somethin out trust me. Keep us posted on this. Good luck :)
...............................
A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (11 May 2011):
 I think the most important thing is that is has come from YOU and it has come from your heart. You could arrange the most lavish and romantic proposal in the world but if it was not your idea and you were not entirely sure of what you are doing, it would be obvious to your girlfriend and it would not feel 'real'.
So I'm afraid you have to do this one yourself, and if you sat down and thought about it properly you would have no problems coming up with ideas. You know this woman better than we all do, so what does she like? What are her hobbies? What are her favourite things?
For example, she might love flying - so take her on a hot air baloon ride. She might love champagne and chocolates - so take her on a romantic picnic or to a beach, open a bottle of champagne, have some roses and the chocolates there, and then propose.
It has to be linked to HER, what she likes, what makes her happy....and something that relates to you as a couple as well. Maybe there is a special place you have that holds some fond memories, maybe there is somewhere you have been meaning to go together for years but have never had chance to get there.....we dont know your personal stories so you have to be the one to come up with your own ideas that relate to you as a couple.
At the end of the day, if you are proposing chances are she is going to be the happiest girl in the world when you get down on one knee (that part is crucial....you must get down on one knee and do it properly!) and ask her to marry you. So where you do it and how you do it are not as important as the fact that you are asking to spend the rest of your life with her.
So if I were to give you the best advice I can think of it would be as follows:
1. Location - make sure you are alone, just the 2 of you. Somewhere that has meaning to both of you, or doing something that you know she loves. But it has to come from your heart, you have to think of it yourself so she knows you have made a lot of effort getting it right yourself, not by getting someone else to do it for you.
2. Ask her parents for permission. This might just be me being traditional, but before you propose asking the parents is a really nice thing to do. Asking just the dad is a bit old fashioned, but sitting down with both her mum and dad and telling them what you have planned is courteous and involves them in the excitement of you getting engaged.
3. Think very carefully about the ring! You need to have this nailed before you propose, so are you going to buy one and propose with the ring? Are you going to buy one after and let her choose her own? Or are you going to buy an uncut diamond, propose with that and then get it made into a ring? The worst thing you can do is propose with no ring and just not mention it - she will want that ring on her finger so you need to make it clear if you dont have a ring that you are going to go shopping and buy one on xxx day.
4. Most importantly - be natural and be yourself. If you are not typically the most romantic guy, then dont all of a sudden go over the top with the romance as this is not who you are. She is saying yes (hopefully!) to the guy you are day in day out, not some stranger who has suddenly turned up to propose. Yes it is important to make the proposal romantic and memorable, but she will remember it because it is the day you asked her to marry you, not because you had xx amount of roses or were in xx place. It can be as simple as out on a walk at sunset on a beautiful day, with nothing but the two of you and the fresh air. Trying too hard will make you look uncomfortable and she will have an idea that something is up, so best to do something that comes naturally to you so you wont give the game away!
If you reply with some of her favourite things or what you know makes her happiest, then I am sure we can send you some better suggestions that are more personal to you both, rather than suggesting our own dream proposals because chances are, what we like your girlfriend might hate!
I hope this helps and good luck!
...............................
|
