A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I've been in a two and a half year relation ship. I care about her so much but i'm falling out of love.I just haven't been happy the past few month. the fights over the littlest things. comments always in a nasty tone. talking about what we could do better but we both don't follow through. so tonight i told her i wasn't happy and i still cared but just don't feel the love anymore and i wanted to be friends. of course she's heart broken. of course i'm heartbroken for her. and we cry together for an hour and a half. then she says i'll do anything to get you to stay. it broke my heart. i just don't know what to do. should i give it a chance again? please help.p.s her family and my family have grown really close together.
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female
reader, cocoqueen88 +, writes (2 August 2010):
Relationships always go in cycles... just like everything else in the world. You got to stick through the good and the bad. so since you both know what the issues are it's time for some corrective behavior. since she obviously wants to work things out and you sound like you really arent sure... take it easy and work through things.it's tough and you always want someone who'll work through the bad times instead of just bailing out. she's willing to work on it so give it a chance.
A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (2 August 2010):
Hey,
You are not alone. Almost all relationships go through problems. It looks like you two have the bad habit of rude communication. That kind of talking is promoted strongly in TV and music, and movies. Because we are exposed to it so often we accept it into our lives even though we know that it makes us feel bad when someone talks to us that way.
What you two need to do is to throw out the blame and decide to beat this problem together. There will be a lot of times you both will have to say, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that, that way." Surely you love each other enough to have a do over, maybe a hundred do overs.
When you both see that you love each other enough to try harder, it will bring you together. You will express that love much more often.
So, The honeymoon is over. There are many advantages to the slow glowing warmth of a mature love. It's not as exciting as the flares and explosions of new love, but it is steady and reliable, and a real comfort. You two have a whole lifetime ahead of you. You can get past this bump in the road.
FA
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