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What things do guys say that they don't actually mean?

Tagged as: Dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (2 February 2011) 2 Answers - (Newest, 2 February 2011)
A female New Zealand age 30-35, anonymous writes:

dear readers this is a question sort of...for men to answer. (or possibly highly opiniated women)

im kind of asking this for all the female population that randomly stmble upon this article.

what things DO YOU guys say that you dont actually mean?

"like yes im listning to you honey" when your actually really concentrating on your rugby match.

so what are they, what do you say to women, your GF, your friends, your parents that you dont actually mean?

also what are your most commenly used ennuendos?

im not kidding, i know you guys use sexual ennuendos for alot of conversation.

" yup ive got a pretty big tree in my garden..yup the women love it. i just love how it grows."

you get what i mean, so spill, what are they.

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A male reader, Jmtmj Australia +, writes (2 February 2011):

Jmtmj agony auntWhat kc 100 said.

We're pretty simple folk.

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A female reader, k_c100 United Kingdom +, writes (2 February 2011):

k_c100 agony auntWell, with regards to this question:

"like yes im listning to you honey" when your actually really concentrating on your rugby match.

What they really mean is "please stop talking when there is something I am really interested in on TV". Generally, with men, if they are looking forward to something like a big match, or playing a new game etc, then when it actually comes around and they get to do it - there is no point in trying to talk to them because that is what they are focused on. Men dont multi-task particularly well (some can, but the majority are not great) and when something important is happening (sports, games, etc are very important to them) then they simply cannot divide their attention between you and the other thing they are interested in.

It does not mean he doesnt care about you, or is not interested in listening to you talk - it is simply that you have picked a bad time to talk to him. Just like if a guy tried to talk to you when you were painting your nails, or waxing your legs or something like that - you would not really want him to be talking at the point as you are distracted and in the middle of something else. If a guy has interests that he is passionate about, like rugby in this instance, then respect that and give him some space to enjoy his interests. Relationships work so much better when you learn to respect that you both have separate interests and give each other space to enjoy them - we all have times when we want to enjoy something alone without our partners trying to have a discussion with us!

As for trying to explain ALL the things that men say that they dont mean - well thats just not possible as every guy is different and they all say different things. Just as I could be here all day explaining all the things that women say that they dont mean - we are just as guilty as men! A lot of what women say has hidden meanings - like when girls will ask a guy "Oh what do you think of Angelina Jolie? Do you think she is pretty" - that is really our way of saying "you better not like her because I look nothing like her, so if you fancy her that means you dont fancy me".

Women are actually far worse at saying things with hidden meanings, we will always ask questions to our partners that we then get upset with the answer because we actually had a hidden meaning behind the question. So dont think then men are the ones that always say things they dont mean - generally it is us girls that are far worse!

Normally men are very straight forward, they dont want any drama and will normally always say what they mean. If they dont say what they mean, then normally it is either to avoid hurting our feelings, or because they are distracted by something else. Men really are simple creatures, they really are not as confusing as you might think!

As for the innuendos - again, each guy will use different ones and this will differ by culture (keep in mind that Dear Cupid is a global site so what you might say in NZ will be very different to what we say in the UK). They are pretty obvious though when a guy says one - normally it is in front of all his mates (so they will laugh giving it away) and it is always sex or penis related. You have a brain so you will be able to put two and two together - you will know one when you hear one so dont worry about getting someone to explain every innudeno under the sun to you.

Your understanding of guys will come with time, the older you get the more you learn about the opposite sex. So dont worry yourself with their behaviour or what they say, chances are you will be far more confusing to a guy than he is to you!

I hope this helps and good luck!

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