A
female
age
36-40,
*hPinkyGirl
writes:My boyfriend of three plus years and I have been broken up for 2 and a half months now because of a lot of stresses in our lives. I left him alone for a while and he started texting and calling me. We then started hanging out with each other and became intimate again. I asked him what was going on with us and he said he loves me and love being with me. He doesn't want the pressure of having labels right now. He said he understands if I don't want to be intimate. I told him that I love him and I'm ok with this right now as long as there is no one else and isn't going to be anyone else. We both agreed not to date anyone. He said hes not looking for anyone else. I told him that I don't want to be friends with benefits and he said that he doesn't either and that what we have is more than friends. We basically act like a couple but it's not declared.Should I just be patient or is this trouble? He knows I want to reconcile and is not the type to play with my emotions. I'm just trying to look out for myself right now.
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female
reader, theresag  +, writes (23 July 2011):
Sounds like a wishy washy relationship to me.Is this all you want.You wont meet a person with more to offer while you make do.I have been in this situation myself and was unavailable for 2 years plus.In the end i couldnt even tell my friends why i was upset when we 'broke up'.Yuck!
A
female
reader, Juliet  +, writes (23 July 2011):
tricky tricky tricky.... whats wrong with the label if you are matching the criteria for the label? ... not seeing others, not looking, acting like a couple when your together.. to be honest I cant understand why he wouldn't of just asked for more alone/mates time or whatever. . . since thats effectively what he wants right? You should query this with him. (ps. Who is the label for? You both right? It sounds like he's tryin to have the best of both worlds... a girlfriend and a plausible excuse for not addressing any stressors like the ones that has caused this. E.g. This way when/if you fight he can say 'well this is why i dont want a label... i dont want to row about couply things'... but i bet he still wants the chats, intimacy etc right?)Whats important here is what you'll be happy with, not just what you'll accept.Best of luck hun
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