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What should I do if my boyfriend asks for sex?

Tagged as: Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 February 2013) 8 Answers - (Newest, 6 February 2013)
A female Nigeria age 26-29, anonymous writes:

Dear cupid, am 16 and a virgin i love my b/f very much but what should i do if he ask for sex?

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A male reader, Serpico United States +, writes (6 February 2013):

You should say no until you are ready.

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A male reader, Glacier Belgium +, writes (4 February 2013):

Nothing wrong with sex at 16 per se but often it´s a bit too soon.

First ask yourself if you feel ready for it.

If you have any doubts then wait and tell him you're not ready.

He should respect that. This is actually a very good test to find out if he really cares about you.

If he cares then he will happily wait for you.

Once you´re ready then talk about birth control first.

If you dare, you can always offer him a handjob. That can be an exciting and fun intermediate step before you guys go any further. Make sure you do clean your hands afterwards before touching yourself.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (4 February 2013):

So_Very_Confused agony auntif you are not ready (and clearly you are not if you are asking) you say "i'm not ready"

if he pushes you or tries to force you, he does not care about you and you should end the relationship.

if he truly cares about you he will say "ok I'll wait till you are ready"

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2013):

If your not ready then you should tell him that you are not ready and ge keeps on to the point that he's pushing you to then you should leave him because if he doesn't care enough to wait until you are ready the he is not worth being with. Because there will be a time when you are ready and it will feel right if your with someone that you have strong feelings for and you will be glad that you waited.

Hope this helps.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2013):

Just tell him you're not ready, end of story.

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A male reader, CMMP United States +, writes (4 February 2013):

Say whatever you WANT. If you don't want to tell him no and tell him why. You should probably bring the subject up beforehand.

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (4 February 2013):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntIf he asks for sex, you say to him (VERY POLITELY!):

"Thanks for your solicitation, but I think that sex (I'm assuming that you mean intercourse) is out of the question for me, now..... as I'm only 16 or 17.... and that's 'way to intimate and complicated for me, at the moment...."

IF he persists, you say, "Geeesh, I guess you didn't listen to what I said you, last time.... which was a veiled way to give you an "out" for your inappropriate suggestion.... so let me 'splain it to you more succinctly: "You ain't getting no nik-nik from me for at least a couple of years... at which time I MIGHT be ready"... is THAT clear enough, (his name here)?"

Good luck...

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (4 February 2013):

Honeypie agony auntNo?

There is nothing wrong in NOT being ready or willing to have sex at 16. If he can't respect that, maybe he is NOT the guy for you. Don't let anyone pressure you into having sex if you aren't ready.

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