A
male
 ,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I'm a 19 year old student and I've never been in a proper relationship. My best friend was a girl who recently moved away, and the person who I'm closest to now is another girl. I've known her for just over a year but now we've become a lot closer I've developed a really big crush on her.This is the third time I've had a crush on my best friend. The only problem is I've seen this happen to her before and know she doesnt react well to it. She says I'm the best friend she's ever had but I know she's completely out of reach. Just to complicate matters she keeps saying she really wants a relationship, she's older, and very attractive, which I'm not. Why do I keep doing this?Another girl I've liked for ages has recently started paying me attention and I'm actually ignoring her because of this.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2005): i don't understand why people think that love relationship = happiness, because being truly best friends with someone can be just as emotionally awarding as being in a love relationship. Most married couples end up just considering each other as "best friends." I say if you REALLY want this to happen, you just need to wait. You don't want to alienate her before she's ready, and then you'll just end up not having her as a girlfriend or as a best friend. Give her hints, show interest in other people, get her to realize that she's not the center of your world, and maybe she'll pay more attention to you, because most girls love attention. hope this helps.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2005): I often had the same experiences where I found myself falling for my best friend. The thing is, you don't know if she feels the same for you. If you really are great friends, then it shouldn't be as difficult as it seems to start something more. Causually slip hints in conversations to judge her feelings. You'll never know if you don't try!
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A
female
reader, beenthere +, writes (6 November 2005):
people often mistake the love for a close friend in this way. take notice of the girl who's interested. 19 is still young. i was in a serious relationship and had a baby by the time i was 19 and i know now, 6 years later, that i was too young. go out and have fun with the girl who is interested. you'll begin to understand the difference between friendship love and relationship love. good luck
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A
female
reader, 360sense +, writes (6 November 2005):
Are you in love with the close relationship or the person? Let say it's the relationship. Can't you build one with the person that's admiring you? Let's say it's the person. If you like her so much don't you owe it to your self to see what could happen. Life isn't about making life altering desicions based on someone elses possible reaction. If this is your "best friend" an honest talk won't hurt you do it all the time. She could be the one and your putting your fear of rejection first.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2005): When you finally grow up, a few years difference in age will not mean as much as it does to you now. I can't imagine what you are doing worrying about your " looks" when you obviously aren't " Ugly " to these girls. Why don't you leave the judgement about that to the girls? If you want to have a relationship with your current best friend, and that is what she wants, why not try? Who knows? You may find that she is Miss Right for you? It would be a shame if you missed this opportunity for happiness because you were afraid to take that chance.
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