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male
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anonymous
writes: I've been with my girlfriend for 5-years now. Here lately things just haven't been the same. Ending the relationship has crossed my mind many times recently. The one problem I have is that I am the worst at breaking up with someone. I never know what to say. I feel so horrible for putting someone through that pain that I have felt before. How can I let my girlfriend down easy? If there is such a thing. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2005): Mr Ed
I think your response to this guy was spot on.
Cheers maggie
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (6 November 2005):
 Breaking up should be fast like pulling off a bandaid. Don't give any false hopes just be firm and quick. Don't prolong her pain.
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A
female
reader, beenthere +, writes (6 November 2005):
talk to her about what you think has gone wrong before you make a decision. see if you can work through it and improve the situation. tell her how you've been feeling but you still want to be with her. if you still feel the same after, say, 6 months, you have to let her go. 5 years is a lot to throw away so make sure you make the right decision.
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A
female
reader, 360sense +, writes (6 November 2005):
BE HONEST!!! Say how you feel tell her you love her but you don't see a future and you don't want to waste her time. Or wait another five years and break up with her see how that goes.
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A
female
reader, suggafoot08 +, writes (6 November 2005):
Yes, I think that there is a way to break up w/ your g/f. Personally,if I was you I would sit down and talk to her...Maybe say that you just dont feel the same(but,dont ever not give a girl an excuse why). The way I see things is if you two are meant to be,then you will be....Love will work themselves out.
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A
male
reader, Mr.Ed +, writes (6 November 2005):
 This answer is simple, looking on the outside to your general question. You ask yourself one simple question. Do I MAKE HER HAPPY ANYMORE? The question is very simple the answer is very clear. If you don't make her happy then guess what. YOU NEED TO REMOVE YOURSELF SO SOMEONE ELSE CAN MAKE HER HAPPY. Love is about your giving and no it's not 50/50 it's 110% of the time. You used to make her laugh, you used to make her smile, you used to like hugs and kissing her. Whenever you stop trying or keep feeling as though you need to go then you really need to go. YOUR MISERABLE about how your going to tell her. I have a great idea for all men. GROW UP tell her the absolute truth. You have failed at making your promise good. Yes, I said it you promised her forever and to make her happy. We say these things because it feels right at the time. Now the truth is you failed. So be a real man and explain this to her and don't make her feel as though it's all her fault. Just explain that you can't keep fighting these feelings inside that if your not happy, you damn sure can't make her happy and there is no one else. Well, except you, yourself, and just say I. You know half my relationships ended badly and they always blammed me. Then I blammed them and guess what THEY STILL ENDED. I would have rather walked away knowing that the other person still had their dignity and respect for theirselves. Not crush them with blame and shame. So if you hold your head low because your afraid to hurt her. You need to understand that your killing her by wasting her time. Just tell her the truth and agree to be resonable about the split and WALK. It's not worth it. A word of caution though, Most relationships get to the fifth year/sixth year and end because it's when you become too comfortable with each other and you think you know everything about that person, that you question your ablility to love. If you really want a good challenge then try this one on. Try to go back to when you first met her and try to fall in love with her all over again. REMEMBER I HAVE A THOUSAND REASONS TO LEAVE and only one to stay. The trick is to stay focused on why I loved and am still loving her today. So leave or stay it's your choice but, MAKE A DECISION before your more miserable.
GOOD LUCK
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A
female
reader, No problem to big +, writes (5 November 2005):
hi
Well re-think whether breaking up with her and if you still can't make up your mind then talk to her and say i dont think this relastionship is going anywhere. you never no your girlfriend might be thinking the same thing.
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