A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:What are the attributes you look in a relationship that it will work. What make relationships successful and what things to look as traits that make it worthy and long lasting?? I am hurt and being cheated upon so I need help to find the right one!! Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks so much for your time and sharing your experience :-)
Highly appreciated :-)
Bless you all
A
female
reader, Abella  +, writes (16 February 2013):
 I am really pleased that you are getting some great answers to your question.
JadedPearl added some good thoughts in her follow up to this article about the same issues you are asking about.
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/what-are-the-attributes-and-conditions-for-a.html
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (16 February 2013):
 Hi
for me...
Good two-way communication
Trust
Respect
Ability to laugh at each other and with each other
Same goals
The *X* factor
Consideration
Compramise
Letting me sleep window side of the bed
To name but a few....
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A
female
reader, Stelladra  +, writes (16 February 2013):
Look for a woman with character. So many ofus fall for superficial things like looks but character is what really matters for a long lasting relationship. Because in the end looks fade but you are married to someone's character for life. Look for honesty,integrity, kindness, compassion, empathy, loyalty, giving, living, nurturing and humour. Those are qualities that you want to spend a lifetime with. Good luck!
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (16 February 2013):
 There are so many factors that aren't tangible. My current partner is someone I plan to spend my life with so I will try to put down why:
-trustworthy (so important)
-reliable and dependable
-amazing chemistry
-strong attraction both physically and emotionally
-sexual compatibility
-moral/political/religious compatibility
-similar long term goals
Other things, we have nothing in common whatsoever in terms of interests/hobbies, so we are constantly learning from each other and doing things outside our comfort zones. I feel like we complement each other well (he is hyper rational, I am fairly emotional, he is outdoorsy, I am a couch potato, he is shy, I'm more outgoing, etc...) and broaden each other's horizons. It's so important that your partner challenges you (in the good way) and teaches you, and visa versa.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (16 February 2013):
 Traits to look for (basic essential foundations):
-someone who fights fair
-someone who knows what they want and can express themselves
-someone who doesn't lie (not even about small things, because people who lie about small things also lie about big things)
-someone who respects you and admires you (not worships you, there's a difference)
-someone who is independent, who can manage on their own. A person who is independent wont need you to "fix" them, or always cling to you, or be emotionally needy. Someone independent will enrich your life, rather than suck out your energy.
I am sure there are many self-help books and articles out there that will help you. But most importantly, YOU need to figure out what you want in life, and what you want out of a relationship. What sort of relationship do you want? Then imagine, what sort of person would you need in order to have such a relationship?
For example, if you want marriage and children, and have a calm relationship with happiness, and a marriage with patience and a wife you can trust and depend on.. don't get involved with a party girl who does drugs and always borrows money to get by. She'd never be able to give you the type of relationship you want.
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