A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:What is the best way to get back your husband's sexual attention? I feel my husband does not look at me with desire. And never really care to have sex with me.I'm not sure what is going on, but I would like to make some changes from my side, and see what happens. So what is the best way, to get your husband's sexual attention back to work again, and what could be the cause of the decreased desire? Thanks Reply to this Question
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male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (9 December 2011):
 You may possibly consider my response crude, depending on your experience or orientation, but have you tried an occasional blow job? In my experience and obviously with many others, it sparks a sexual relation. However, if desired, it should also be a shared oral experience. Just a suggestion.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 December 2011): a)Cook and serve his dinner wearing only an apron and perfume
b)Give him a long massage with soothing oils
c)Put your hottest undies on and stand in front of the television
OR simply cook him a meal, create a mellow atmosphere, and, in a non confrontational way, ask, talk, find out if his job or money or health are troubling him, and take it from there
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A
female
reader, bluecow +, writes (9 December 2011):
 can I just add a couple more things to odds excellent questions
How was your sex life in the past?
Has it changed or has it always been stilted?
Have you changed (appearance or attitude generally)?
Has he changed (appearance or attitude generally)?
Have you recently had some other family/life stresses (loss of job, house move, new baby, teenager strife or kids left home)?
How are you at communicating on a more general level?
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (9 December 2011):
 Depends on a lot of things. Can you post a follow-up with any or all of the following information (obviously, don't worry about posting anything you're uncomfortable with):
What kind of shape are you in (including your BMI)? How good is your skin, and how long is your hair? What do you want from him sexually (increased frequency or quality of sex, one or more specific sex acts)? What do you know about what he wants sexually (same things)? How often do you initiate sex? How often do you try to entice him to initiate sex, and what tactics do you use? How often do you touch each other non-sexually during the day? And how would you generalize most of your day-to-day communication?
I'm just going to assume you've tried talking to him, but have made no progress. With some more background, we could probably narrow it down to a few simple (not necessarily easy, but simple) points.
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