A
female
age
30-35,
*ulu55
writes: I have no idea how to explain my problem. But here it goes: X has recently become my boyfriend. he's a very nice guy and he's hilarious. he's 20 years old and around the age 15 he used to flirt with alot of girls and basically kissed half the population of america!he's had sex with 3 girls. never had a real relationship except now with me. he said that he's down being a little kid and he wants to change. his family was surprised to see me because it wasnt normal for him to have a girlfriend i guess. BUT the problem is that i have the feeling he's clingy,bossy, and stubborn. I am an opened minded person and can tolerate alot. but i hate childish games when it comes to relationships. i told him i wanted to go to the mall and he said why?? you cant, all the guys are going to look at you. and i look at him and say "Excuse me? i can go where i want" and he got upset and said fine do what you want, so i did, bcuz he can't boss me around! and when i'm in class i can't answer his texts or if i'm with friends i don't really answer texts and it bothers him that i don't text him for 3 hours or so. and i give him my reasons but he says that he doesn't like that he texts me and doesn't' get a response. and he sometimes says "you're a lucky girl" what the heck does he mean by all of this?! he says "this is the way i am, i like being different and i won't change" (which screams STUBBORN)is this a game? because i'm certainly not going to tolerate it unless i know that he can be cracked, and that i am able to change all this. i just don't know how, and there has to be a certain method that will allow me to change this stubbornness..any suggestions please?...i'm desperate..
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (9 December 2011):
DO NOT love someone's potential. You have to accept them where they are.
IF he is currently not meeting the needs you have what makes you think he will change?
if it's a game do you want to play it?
he is stubborn. that probably will not change no matter what METHODS you employ. he is who he is.
either love him and accept him as he is or move on.
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