A
female
age
30-35,
*osy
writes:http://www.dearcupid.org/question/im-laying-low-and-just-concentrating-on-college.htmlwas the original post I left...Any ideas on when its safe to talk to the ex again? I really miss him and have been miserable for a long time. If you had been treated like I treated him how long would you need (Im guessing a few months, maybe more?) and what would you want them to say? From a boys perspective what is he gaining by shunning me?
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female
reader, Cosy +, writes (12 March 2008):
Cosy is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhmm.
thanks.
Bit rude but i asked for your help so i shall take it.
and thank-you to the first person too.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2008): What are you gaining by trying to contact him again?For him it is simple, relationship is over, he is moving on and going on with his life. That is normal. It is not like the two shared years of marriage or have kids to raise.Some people seem to want their ex to think well of them. How close is this to wanting your ex to pine away with unrecruited love while you go on with your life?Oh sure I dumped you, broke your heart, but don't think bad of me, because that makes me feel bad.The relationship is over, let it be. Maybe time will heal the wounds, or MAYBE for him they are already healed but since you are not longer an item, he sees no need to be around you any more.Instead concentrate on yourselve, you claim you are a faithful girl but have a fling with two other guys in a matter of weeks? Exactly what would your definition of unfaithfull be? If you had an orgy with the entire school?Ask yourselve honestly, why do you still care what this guy thinks? Yes, you might still love him, or does your self-image just not allow it that this guy doesn't like who you are?Be honest, why should he?Imagine that you two got back together, how soon would it be before you dated another guy again?Let him be, and concentrate on your own feelings first, I think if you really looked at yourself, you will find why he doesn't want to be around you anymore.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2008): ...I'm going through a similar situation with my ex, so i'm gonna have a completely biased opinion, so my answer or advice may not be the most popular or best solution...but I really miss my ex even though she treated me like crap, I've been shunning her for essentially 2 months and its killing me...i just wish she would approach me and talk so that we can make things right between us again...he may be shunning you cause he misses you so much and that is his way of coping with the pain...that's my take, good luck
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