| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: Why is he saying what he's saying? I broke up with my fiance a month ago, and told him to leave me alone, but just today he added me as a friend on myspace. I looked at his page, and it said he didn't have a girlfriend anymore and that he was free at last. I was pissed because I am the one who is free at last from his abuse. If he's going to put up things like that and all these new pictures of him with girls, why is he adding me as a friend and acting like nothing is wrong and that he's glad he is done with me? Remember, he's the one who has been calling and texting me and sending me videos saying how much he misses and loves me! Why is he doing this! I feel like calling him and yelling at him, but that's probably just what he wants. I only messaged him on myspace commenting about his new relationship status comment and for him to leave me alone and that I don't want to be friends with him on myspace or in real life.
View related questions:
broke up, fiance, myspace, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, citris  +, writes (3 December 2007):
 Jovial is right, this guy is trying to get your hackles up! He just wants to hurt you the way you hurt him when you broke it off. It's not uncommon or unnatural to want to hurt those who hurt you. However I have to say it sounds like a petty and immature game this guy is playing and I wouldn't give him the time of day. Every one of your friends and family know the truth of the situation and that is, YOU were the one who left him, not the other way around. That is all that should matter, what he says or writes about you holds no truth, you know this and the ones that matter know this. Eventually those who believe him will either see this, or go on believing him and do you really care what people like that would think? You really shouldn't.
It's also a common tactic for guys to use the "woe is me, my ex was such a drag...blah blah blah" lines on new women in their lives for sympathy. I myself have even fallen for this...sad, but it works because women generally are the more sympathetic of the sexes. This may be his way of trying to twistedly find a new partner, by badmouthing you and making like he's so happy with his newfound freedom, when really and truly he's a wounded dog trying to make like he's brave.
Best of luck to you, hope that you find a relationship with someone worthwhile, loving and mature!
Citris
A
female
reader, Jovial  +, writes (7 November 2007):
 Hi
I know it will be a bad idea to tell you never to look because you seem fragile and irritated by his behaviour and I think that is the cause of your curiosity. You were deeply hurt and when you sneak into his life you find him seemingly enjoying his life, that is crap my dear. This guy is not over you and as abusive as he is thats why he is using his profile, calls, videos etc etc to get your attention. and unfortunately you have been responding to all his tactics, even thogh is not what he is looking for, but the bottom line he wanted a reaction and you gave it to him.
I would say before you deal with him deal with your pain first, sort out your feelings otherwise you will keep falling into his tricks and yet again he will tell his pals you cant let him go.
Yes dont call him, its not going to be easy but its the right thing to do, let him be and live yourself as if what he is doing doesnt hurt you, you will be satisfied with the results. If you cant beat them join them, so play his game and you will be proud of the winner.
Jovial
...............................
A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (7 November 2007):
 Hi,
calling him will be exactly what he wants, he did this to bait you.
But I'm wondering why you were looking at his facebook page anyway. If I was you I would ignore everything to do with this guy. Out of sight out of mind.
Good luck and thank your lucky stars you are rid of him.
...............................
A
female
reader, aphrodite +, writes (7 November 2007):
 I'm sorry, this really isn't a good situation. The best thing you can do is just delete his request, and don't look at his MySpace. Soon you'll be posting pics of yourself with hott guys :]
...............................
|
