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What does the appearance of her toothbrush at my place mean?

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Question - (27 June 2016) 11 Answers - (Newest, 28 June 2016)
A male United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I've got a bit of a humorous question, however, it's also a serious one. Ladies, what does it really mean when you leave some of your belongings at a guys place?

The girl I've been sleeping with for a while now just left (Cue the music: "Don don don!").... her TOOTHBRUSH. This is the biggest thing (emotionally speaking) she's ever left here. However, she's always left things here. I think I just never paid attention til now

She's always left earrings, which I never thought about. Just assumed it was an accident. She also left a pair of heels here. Those heels have been here for months. I never cared nor thought anything about it. However, I walked into my bathroom this afternoon after she left, and there it was: the toothbrush. Just chillin right there on the bathroom counter.

She's made jokes before, months ago, in the past, about how leaving it would indictate a commitment so she wouldn't do that. And true to her word, she never did. Until today. She also left her headband on my night stand.

I'm just curious what this means. Ladies, help me out please!

I'm honestly not too bothered by this. We've been sleeping together for about 8 months now. However I'm just curious to find out women's thoughts on this. Was this an accident? Was this intentional? And if so what is the meaning/intention behind it? I'm fascinated!

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A female reader, llifton United States +, writes (28 June 2016):

llifton agony auntI'm actually in a bit of a similar situation, so I can kinda relate. And as goofy as it sounds, I actually understand.

I've been seeing a girl for a while now. We both said we wanted it to remain casual friends with benefits type of stuff. But then, over the course of time, she stayed over more and more and we saw each other and talked more and more. And eventually, she began leaving her things here, as well. I was perfectly okay with it. However, it did make me start to wonder where our relationship was heading. Call it dumb, but those are little hints that a relationship is potentially forming.

I wouldn't say to hold stock in it that she likes you and wants to be with you over a toothbrush. But she definitely could have left it there to gauge your reaction. Or to mark her territory. Women like to mark their territory. So maybe she doesn't want to share you. Anyway, that's my take.

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States +, writes (28 June 2016):

Fatherly Advice agony auntIt's tempting when the OP doesn't return and the topic is fun to wander off into forbidden paths.

I frequently have extra empty drawers in my Truck, but then again I'm a cabinet maker.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (28 June 2016):

CindyCares agony aunt Oh yes, SVC ! I remember the drawer question, even if it was a long time ago, and I remember I answered : Sure ,it is meaningful- in "Friends ", when Chandler decides that he must get over his committment issues, what does he do ? He gives Janice a drawer :)

But drawers are drawers and toothbrushes are toothbrushes.

An offered drawer says : make yourself at home. You belong here.

A toothbrush says : I am a visitor. A frequent one, maybe, and one with good dental hygiene.. yet a visitor.

OP, we are joking around a bit of course. A BIT. Not totally.

If Fatherly Advice also keeps an empty drawer in his truck, his wife needs to be very upset !

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A female reader, Ivyblue Australia +, writes (28 June 2016):

Ivyblue agony auntMarriage...bar har ha. No it means, she has good hygiene and wants to always be kissable. Lucky you

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom +, writes (28 June 2016):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntIt's gross to carry a toothbrush around a lot - if you see each other regularly, she either left it there for that reason or forgot about it, like everything else. That said, maybe she left it there to see how you'd react.

Are you both happy with this indefinite FWB situation? How old are you both?

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (27 June 2016):

So_Very_Confused agony auntI remember my whole "what does it mean when he gives you a drawer" post years ago. (I married him btw)

maybe it's a marriage proposal???

seriously if she forgets stuff, she probably forgot that too.

why are you afraid to ask HER since she's the on who did it and ONLY she knows what it means.

You could make a joke of it and buy that toothbrush a special holder or something to make a big deal about it and see what happens

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States +, writes (27 June 2016):

Fatherly Advice agony auntColor me confused. She said that leaving her toothbrush meant something. and then she did it.

Every thing else is guesswork. Except this, she forgets things all the time. So it could be accidental.

Really, I have no experience here and the wrong point of view to answer the question. I mean, I don't engage in sexual intimacy with people I'm not "committed" to. I've never stayed overnight enough to need a toothbrush on site.

On the other hand I have a brand new in the package tooth brush in my truck. This obviously indicates one of three things:

1) My wife should be worried about who I'm having sex in the truck with.

2) I'm in a committed relationship with my truck and the truck should not be worried about being traded in any time soon.

or 3) I'm really lazy and left the tooth brush in my truck after the last appointment with my dental hygienist.

FA

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A female reader, Ciar Canada +, writes (27 June 2016):

Ciar agony auntI second Honeypie and CindayCares.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2016):

Are you strictly FWB? No strings? That is what it looks like.

Are you exclusive?

Are you HOPING for more?

Just ask her then.

Why did you leave a toothbrush at my place?

Are you in LOVE WITH ME cause you did that?

To me it looks like she is comfortable with you. But it also looks like the girl needs to brush her teeth!!!!

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (27 June 2016):

CindyCares agony aunt I think she got tired of going around with an used toothbrush in her purse, and she thought, that after 8 months of sleeping with you, respecting the terms of your casual arrangement, not invading your privacy, not demanding exclusivity, and not generally making drama, you'd trust her enough to not freak out if she left a toothbrush at your place for her convenience .

Apparently, she got that wrong :)

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (27 June 2016):

Honeypie agony auntI think it means she likes to clean her teeth before bed and when she wakes up... and that carrying around a toothbrush in your purse is nasty.

I wouldn't read more into it.

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