A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:what does it mean when a guy:- looks to see what my reaction to something is before making his own? (ex. something funny happens, he looks to see if i laugh before he does)- i catch him starring at me, and smile at him, he smiles back and looks away. - brings me back things from the store without being asked (he lives with my family).- shares things with me (chips, candy, etc), but no one else in the room. - whispers "secrets" in my ear, even if there is no one else around to hear them.- falls asleep on my bed (with others) while watching movies. BUT, has a girlfriend already... (he started dating her just before he moved into our house). ???????????I'm so confused. i've never been very good with guys, i'm not drop dead gorgeous or extremely thin; or anything most guys my age want. so is he just being kind, or is it something more?. if it is, how do i let him know i'm REALLY interested... ? i'm shy to a fault; this is the only guy up to this point in my life that has made me feel the way i do. please help!
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (2 May 2010):
It means he's a man who can't be trusted at all. Don't fall for his rubbish. First of all you'll look back for stealing another girl's boyfriend. Then when he cheats on you you'll feel even worse.
A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (2 May 2010):
 It means he is a great big jerk who likes to flirt with other women! Look regardless of what any of this behaviour means, he has a girlfriend therefore it cannot go any further so you are just wasting your time even liking him.
You dont want to let him continue flirting with you otherwise you may just end up being the "other woman" in his life, where he can use you for whatever he wants yet still have his girlfriend to fall back on. Even if you started a relationship with him - that would make him a cheat, which means he is all the more likely to cheat on you too.
Just keep your distance from him and if he continues to be over friendly like this just tell him it makes you uncomfortable, and ask him how his girlfriend would feel if she saw him acting like that around you. That should put him back in his place!
It sounds like he is taking advantage of your inexperience and low self esteem by flirting with you, I bet it is a massive ego boost for him and he will be enjoying the fact that you are falling for him (he can probably tell). So you just need to stop this now, he has a girlfriend therefore he is off-limits. How would you feel if you had a boyfriend yet he was flirting with a girl he lived with and she was starting to develop feelings for him? I bet you would be devastated. So always keep his girlfriend in mind - it is not fair on her that this is going on behind her back.
And one final thing - you really need to work on your confidence! First things first, not all men like skinny girls, FACT. I am pretty curvy, with big hips, big boobs and a small waist. I am by no means thin but I attract huge amounts of attention from men, of all ages! But the reason I get this attention is because I know how to make the most of my shape, and I am confident and happy with my shape (most of the time!). If you are confident and happy with your body then this shines through, and is massively attractive to men. Not all men want to date a girl that resembles a pre-pubescent boy who doesnt eat and has to go to the gym every single day. All guys are different in terms of what they like in a girl so dont write yourself off just because you have a woman's shape!
Second of all - not many people on the earth are "drop dead gorgeous" and the ones who are get a lot of help from the magazines they appear in with their hair & make-up stylists, good lighting and a lot of airbrushing! What is more important is that you are real, you have good bits and bad bits about your body. You have a personality and you are a good person - that makes you gorgeous, not the way you look. Being a happy, confident and kind person is so much more attractive than a bitchy gorgeous type (think Megan Fox - she is beautiful but as soon as she opens her mouth she is just a vain idiot!).
If you just start to make the most of the way you look, and be proud that you have a lot to offer the world with your intelligence and great personality, then you will soon see your luck change with guys - and you wont get guys like this one who are just big flirts taking advantage of you.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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