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*astedLife
writes:Can anyone really define "BE YOURSELF" properly, so we all know what it means? People use this expression all the time, yet it does not parse in an intelligible way. If I were to "be myself", I would never leave my land, and spend most of my life just working on my projects. That is where I am most comfortable, unless already in a relationship. Then I would want to be with my lover.Any ideas? Reply to this Question
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reader, WastedLife +, writes (9 May 2008):
WastedLife is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks, everybody, for your empathy and concern. There is a lot of love on this site, and I really appreciate it. Complex has mentioned the need for reflection, and if I did any more, I'd be a mirror! Kimaxsi just has all kinds of good thoughts, and everyone else has been really helpful too!
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2008): I don't do well alone either. The man I discribed earlier is your age, and alone. He keeps himself distracted by constantly having a project to work on. He is nesting. The powers that be sometimes keep us alone so we can reflect on ourselves to be better prepared for a soul mate. Females are complicated creatures, and require a lot of mental stability. Age has nothing to do with your readiness, take my word, I live in Hawaii and know many men, far older than you that recently found love they thought they'd never find. They are happy and well rounded because they took their time;)
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reader, WastedLife +, writes (9 May 2008):
WastedLife is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIn response to Kimaxsi, you might not need a lover to be complete, but I do. I've been told I can be happy alone, but never have been able to. It's sadness and despondence always, every day, all day, even though I am very successful in every other way. It's the only part of my life I have never been able to reliably create. I don't know how old you are, but likely I am much older than you and have worked far harder to get a lover and try to keep her happy. Of course, keeping her happy, when possible, was a labor of love. I only wanted to have one lover in my life - I have no desire for variety, just connection. I would be happy on a desert island with just one lover for a lifetime, but certainly not being there alone. Maybe you don't need sexual connection, but I do, and six months without a lover is devastating. I still love everyone I have ever slept with.
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reader, WastedLife +, writes (8 May 2008):
WastedLife is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone so far. Especially Kimaxsi for the generous flow of words. For the record, I do live in my feelings, do meditate daily, and appreciate the quiet and solitude of my beautiful surroundings far more than the pretending that goes on during social interaction, unless, of course, I am with a lover, and then I feel connected to that person, and am glad to contribute to the situation. I can do this alone and even be witty, but it is so painful I would rather just stay home.
The only reason to be social for me is to meet a like-minded lover, and then we can be complete without wasting time on the pretending of society. I have no special sense of humor, and only want one for the social parody/game that I would rather avoid. I have no desire to harm others, human or animal, and simply wish to spend each night with "my" beautiful woman, and each day being productive, nurturing, and appreciating. And that is the person I have looked for all my life. Being truly myself is a social turnoff and the time wasted doing that is unfathomable. Perhaps someone has a better way of meeting one's mate...... I have never enjoyed the chase, only the rare success.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2008): It means not copying anyone else, and staying true to yourself. Not putting on a front, not going along with anything you'd prefer not to - it's doing what you feel is best and not changing for anyone else.
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reader, big_boi199 +, writes (8 May 2008):
"BE YOURSELF" means to act how you were raised or to do what you want to do and dont change that way for anyone.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2008): I know a man with the same exact "be yourself" views as you! And he loves to stay on his land, and finish his projects. Be yourself.....hm. Well, the only thing that comes to my mind is roots. You are who you are based on your roots; where they came from, and where they are planted now. I really dont think the term is a steriotype, cause I believe those are for people who dont know anyting about themselves because the are too busy adjusting themselves for other people. Everything about you stems from your roots. Your values, morals, views of way of life, religion, etc. This is just an opinion, not a fact:) Hope that was of some help.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2008): Reflect your true emotions, beliefs, needs and desires.
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