A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:What is one of the first things or characteristics a women sees when looking at a man for the first time(potential boyfriend)? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (26 July 2010):
 Daniel is correct; it's all relative.
Two things come to mind when someone asks me what I look for in a man.
The first criterion is one that not every single woman will mention but it means everything to me.
Someone who appreciates my guitar playing, and supports it. I've played the guitar since I was 12 years old and it's my passion. I'm very serious about it and my ambition is to take it to the next level, because I believe that it's important to follow your heart and your dreams.
I can't stand people who try to keep me away from it or criticize me for playing the guitar too much, or "you love that guitar more than you love me." It's not like I suck or anything. It has nothing to do with the quality of my music, either. The one man I've ever truly *loved* in my life (who eventually went on to break my heart, but that's another story) appreciated my music, listened to me play, jammed with me, always went to see my band rehearse or perform. No coincidence.
On a more universal level, I would imagine that most women seek a man who understands their dreams and passions.
Second, a man who is nice and sweet, who knows how to listen. He'd be understanding and a good listener.
If I can't find a man with these qualities, then I'll just have to be an old lady with cats. People say I'm picky, and I am, but I refuse to settle.
Bad hygiene, bad temper, uptightness, disrespectfulness really put me off.
I've also always been super attracted to Latino men. I'm not prejudiced against other groups of guys, I just love latin culture and I lived in two latin countries and really felt a sense of belonging and being understood. It seems most people want to date "their own kind," but I identify more with Latin culture, though I'm from USA.
A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (26 July 2010):
 Im all those nice things.... This questions for the ladies but would i be wrong if i said it depends on the woman and her mood at the time... Ive met women that liked really skinny stick and bone guys and other women like large round men. Some women love bad boys.. or bad men.. I think most women have an ideal of what they want...but its like buying a car you never end up with exactly what you had in mind.
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A
male
reader, rivi +, writes (26 July 2010):
Masculinity: strength of character; sense of humour; openness; a tight ass.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2010): You'll only get different answers as everyone's an individual and likes different things. So I guess the question you asked isn't going to give you the answer you exactly want.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (26 July 2010):
 You want a hard and fast rule. I will give it to you, with admirable clarity and conciseness:
eiviq' injgi asdgóqenj añldpóqrnga aldjóiqerpn.n-.ai.
lkajlñkajfñl lkdjfñao9qtl lknfoiuqóerj lkjdsflaj´090qj alfjlñakla ñ lañkfqpoujñlnlñk ¿+ npjñlaj pqiur´9qw4i´90328 aejñlaeur´9t.
Were you able to make any sense of it? Well, that's way more sense than you will make about what they see in you. Every woman will tell you something different. Period.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2010): Bad things: bad breath, (he can be the nocest guy but if his breath is bad i won't want to kiss him.), untrustworthy, hard to talk to, up-tight, mean, miserable all the time, too clingy, says "I love you" too early in the relationship (especially if he doesn't actually mean it and isjust scared you'll dump him if he doesn't say it soon).I appreciate some of these are things a woman could not possibly know at first glance but these are general things that put me off men.Good things: SENSE OF HUMOUR (if we have the same sense of humour he'll be easy to talk to which is incredibly important in a relationship, confidence (not too much, but enough to not be annoying), nice teeth, smells nice, easy-going, seems into me (playing hard to get is not necessarily going to be attractive. It can be just plain annoying.)Hope this helped though some of these are the same as Tisha-1's, these are things that most girls look for.By the way, looks aren't important because everyone finds different things attractive. The guy i love is not concidered attractive by any of my friends but to me he's the best looking guy in the world.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (25 July 2010):
 I can tell you the things that have put me off men.
Arrogance. Smelling bad (yes, I'm that shallow). Being physically unhealthy or extreme (obese or overly muscular). Underconfidence (yes, difficult balance between arrogance and this). Loner status. Reputation as a ladies' man. Reputation as a jerk. Being overly controlling by telling me what he expected in a girlfriend on the first date! Inappropriate clothing choices. Looking like a turtle from the side (I told you I was shallow). Being too forward on the first date.
What's appealing? Being attractive. Good manners. Smelling nice. Being nice to people around him. An air of confidence without cockiness.
This is really too broad a question to be answered well. Each woman will have her own individual answers.
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A
female
reader, karen1989  +, writes (25 July 2010):
 Physically:eyes and smile-big bright eyes and a sparkly white smile.And broad shoulders are always nice.
Personality wise:Laid back,Confident BUT NOT COCKY,Knows how to treat a girl,and a guy who can make you laugh without it looking like hes trying to hard with it.
Karen.
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