A
male
age
36-40,
*ontuiiri
writes:Hi,I am 22 and ive never had any luck with girls but i want to change this as i am fed up of being single.i am going clubbing on my birthday and want to chat some girls up but i have absolutely no idea where to start.for example you see a girl on the dancefloor or by the bar, what do you say to start talking to them without them thinking, go away i dont want to talk to you.anyway any advice is much apreciatedW
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2007): no not cheesey at all, in fact it is probably one of the best conversation starters mentioned here
A
male
reader, TomWilkinson +, writes (19 November 2007):
 Not cheesy at all mate, its exactly what you should be saying, it's true, it's about you, go for it!
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A
male
reader, montuiiri +, writes (19 November 2007):
montuiiri is verified as being by the original poster of the question oh just 1 more thing that i can add.
i am new to the area where i am within the past few months, maybe that could be used at some point as to starting conversation? or does that sound a bit cheesy as in like you have made it up and you are just saying your new to get them to tell you stuff?
cheers again. anymore ideas of how to get in there and begin the conversation are greatly noted.
Will
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A
male
reader, montuiiri +, writes (19 November 2007):
montuiiri is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhi everyone.
thanks alot for your posts. they mean alot and i totaly agree with everyone one of them. well ill give it a go, not easy when your not the most confident person, but i guess you just have to do it and have nothing to lose i guess.
cheers
Will
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A
male
reader, TomWilkinson +, writes (19 November 2007):
Being in the pub or club is probably the best place if you aren't confident as there is a lot of fodder for conversation. Like the lady said previously, talking about the music is a good one. Before conversation though, try making eye contact from across the room, and smile, if there's a smile back, the odds are they will be happy for you to approach and engage in conversation. Easy topics are -Talking about things round you - "It's busy in here tonight isn't it!"The music - "So is this the kind of music you're normally into?", "Do you like this band?" etc.Coming across as modest in a jokey way often works for me - "I feel a little out of place here, everyone's too cool!"BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY, never be false, say things that aren't true about yourself ("I'm a millionaire you know!"), or don a false persona, just BE YOURSELF and if they don't like you for you, they aren't worth the effort
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A
female
reader, Mistify  +, writes (19 November 2007):
 Asking her if you can buy a drink may well work. However, here are some conversation starters.
- I absolutely love/hate this song (current song)
- Do you know who this song is by - coz i LOVE it?
- I caught a glimpse of you, and just HAD to come over and talk to you. What's your name?
- What is your favorite cocktail (then buy one for yourself)
Or, you could just be honest (a lot of girls find this really sweet)
- I don't usually do this, so, i don't really know what to say, but HELLO - my name is ......
TIP - don't try and use any of the following:
So gorgeous - how are you?
What's a pretty girl like you doing in a place like this?
OR ANY of the other old clichéd pickup lines.
Most important part is to JUST be yourself, and relax.
Girls pick up on nerves like bees pick up on pheromones.The ABSOLUTE worst that could happen, is that you encounter a mean, self-absorbed girl, who wouldn't even CHAT with you, and then good riddens in any way.
Just smile - and move on...
Good luck - let u know how it goes...
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A
female
reader, shortybabes +, writes (19 November 2007):
 just smile and just say let me buy you a drink, just be yourself and confident but not too confident. Don't be nervous you will meet a lovely girl one day bbz, there is someone out there for everyone, you are still young and free.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2007): sometimes eye contact helps but i guess not all the time, so u may want to talk about the music or the night it self. e.g " this is placed is packed tonight" "do you often come here" start a conversation going. Eventually u will get there and with practise it will ebcome easier to approach people espically girls.
I know what its like sometimes and we may reject "guys" when they come up to us at clubs but not all guys are jerks
Good luck
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