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What do you do when your relationship is in crisis?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating, Long distance<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (28 March 2010) 1 Answers - (Newest, 29 March 2010)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Hey everybody,

I'm 21, I am in such a rediculous situatuion, its like im stuck in a bad dream, and i cant wake up. Ive been with my "ex" now for going on two years in april that is if we survive this situation. Its a long story but i guess i can give you the cliff notes... We met when i was just braking up with my first love and we got together shortly there after. And from the beging we're trampleing on a rocky road. What i mean by that is our lives we're not even close to easy but we were a team, and we destroyed every obsicle in our path. He loved me with his all and alot of the time i questioned us and him because my heart had been broken, but he always did the right thing. We had our own place but then I moved in with his mom, and we just fought like crazy. ANd that went on for about a month and then I left and moved out of state with my mom. But we tried the long distance thing, and it drove us crazy. Brought us closer in some ways and then all the sudden about 2, 2 and a half, months ago he says he needs a brake because he cant do the long distance thing. So instead of talking 5 times a day we talked once a day. lol And then he said since i couldnt give him space he wanted to brake up... That he didnt love me anymore. ( i guess he was lieing but i dint call his bluff) And since ive heard those hurtful words before i just accepted them for what they were and found somebody else immidiatly there after. And we dated and had sex.

Meanwhile he did the same but did not have sex. But he did take this girl on a ski trip, which is very hurtful to me because being very poor i didnt get very much of anything from him, and on top of that it was with the family so our buisness was shared with everybody. Im so imbarrased by that. SO im hurt and he's hurt. ANd our relationship is in serious crisis. And I asked him to help me fix it. And all he can offer me is to try to consider getting back together but he said he needs space and he doesnt wanna talk to me. But he said I have nothing to worry. (meaning he wont do anything further to hurt me) But im worrying. I cant eat and i cant sleep. Because he is the love of life and our future is dangling by a string. So have to give him what he asks but im so scared. And i dont know what to do, what i really wanna do is go out there and make him talk to me. But no. IDK im going crazy any suggestions?

View related questions: long distance, moved in, moved out, needs space

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A female reader, YourDestiny11 United States +, writes (29 March 2010):

YourDestiny11 agony auntOkay...were you thinking about him when you were dating and having sex with other guys(immediately after you broke up)? If you truly love someone then you dont do that. Now that he might be starting a new relationship your worried and want him back. Thats called wanting something you cant have. Sounds like your better off without eachother. My advice to you is to lay off the rebound system a little.

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