A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'm curious what women think of men in their past who they had FWB relationships and how it compares to loves in their life. I've read here many times how women almost always prefer a loving relationship to just a sexual one, but when you finally find that perfect guy or man of your dreams...what becomes in your mind of the sex God you once knew? Does he fade from memory? Does the guy you now love trump even the best lovers in your past (even if the sex is the same or even not as good)? Do you just fondly remember the great sex once in a while? Do you ever miss it? I guess this is somewhat of a retroactive jealousy question, because I am in a relationship where I was the first real love for her, but she had her share of FWB before me, and I get the vibe they were memorable sexual experiences. I'm glad she had a fun past, because it made her the exciting woman she is today, but I guess I am just curious what she might be thinking, but its not a big enough deal for me to ask...I dont want to sound insecure.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2011): Do you people understand what the word "compare" means?
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (11 July 2011):
 This is one of those situations where all you can do is stay where you are, unless the thought of her preferring someone else is so strong that you can't live with her.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (11 July 2011):
 I expect they have faded in whatever 'glory' you have overly ascribed to them and are now insignificant in her memory. Do you begrudge her happy memories of her past? Would it make you feel better if she was miserably unhappy about how awful her past was?
I know RJ is a real problem for some people, so I think the key is to stop yourself from going down that road. Instead of compulsively thinking about the past, consciously focus on the present. Count your blessings with her, make a list and read them out loud whenever you find yourself starting to obsess. I think that by doing that, you will come up with new ways to enhance your loving relationship and make spectacular new memories of your own.
Did you have zero sexual experience before meeting her?
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (11 July 2011):
 Never was in a FWB but I did have sex before I met my husband and I all I can say for myself is: the more intense the love the more intense enjoyment of sex.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (11 July 2011):
 oh and to add to this...
I've been married 3 times and I am with a new man now (together almost 9 months) and he is the love of my life... I never compare him to old lovers/husbands.. He is my life now... my love my partner... he may not be the BEST lover I have ever had... there are compromises I make to have him as a life partner... but since love and building a life together is not all about sex it works.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (11 July 2011):
I think rarely to never of my former FWB... they are but a blip on my radar... I had one serious one and he was a former bf that just morphed into FWB...
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