A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:A question for men:What do you realy mean when you tell a woman you cant be in a "relationship"? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (12 August 2008):
 Hi there,
i believe the modern term for it is : committment phobes. There seem to be an awful lot of men around you woo women with all sorts of promises then when the women finally reciprocate they go walkabouts. We see this on dear cupid all the time. They are not men who only do it for sex, as they always seem to commit themselves to the relationship, but somehow they go cold when the girlfriend opens up to them.
All I can say is tell him to stop texting and contacting you, to me he still holds a torch for you ( men simply do not continue to stay in contact with a girl unless they are interested ) but he is physically unable to commit himself to you. You need to break off all contact, this man will only lead you down the path to more misery. I am sure he has a history of relationships exactly like yours, so do yourself a favour, tell him to leave you alone so you can rebuild your faith in the opposite sex and eventually get yourself back out into the dating world.
Good luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI am the original poster of this question.
My ex boyfriend, just turned around after 7 months of being together and text me saying he didnt want a girlfriend.
even though he was the first to say he loved me after just a month together and said he wanted a family with me and to marry me!
then when I started to say 6 months in that i wanted the same and was happy he finished saying that he didnt want a relationship, wants to be alone and doesnt want to be tied down!
so I think you all have it right, but how do I let myself get over it?
It has been just over 2months since we split and I am still hurting inside! He is still around in my life texting and driving by and watching me.
Tells me how attractive i am etc and then puts me down when i get my hopes up!
Why is he doing that?
what shall i do?
...............................
A
male
reader, Collaroy +, writes (11 August 2008):
Hi,
it can mean many things, but none of them are good especially if you want a relationship.
At best he has someone else and just wants no strings sex and companionship...at worst he doesnt want anything more to do with you.
none of them are good... if you want commitment I'd say you need to look elsewhere if this line has been thrown at you!
good luck!
...............................
A
female
reader, lexilou +, writes (10 August 2008):
 I think justaguy999 has it about right. Everyone has their own reasons. Im a woman not a man and Ive used that line before for these different reasons:-
a) I dont actually want a relationship with you
b) I am on my own for the first time in 17 years and am not ready to settle down again
c) I DO really want a relationship but you said it first and I dont want to look stupid/desperate/needy!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, GuardianAngel +, writes (10 August 2008):
 It means That we are either married with a partner or most coommonly we have just split up from a bad relationship and not yet ready for another one
Yours Sincerely
Guardian Angel
P.s Hope this helps and if you need anything else or any other questions feel free to write a message
...............................
A
male
reader, Inumuro  +, writes (10 August 2008):
Well i have to agree with him that you cant generalize all men, but me ive been to that point and almost let go of the best woman ever. For me it was because i was to afraid of letting something good happen to me and also because i felt i would mess her life up. So in a way i think its a mix of we're afraid and want to protect you from the evil we see in ourselves. but thats just one way to see it. But 90% of the time its because we havent gotten over something in our past.
...............................
A
male
reader, justaguy999 +, writes (10 August 2008):
 I'm not going to answer that specifically because you can't generalise what men say to cover all of us. Every man may mean something completley different when they say they can't be in a relationship. However I will hazard a guess at some more common answers.
1. They are afraid of commitment, and whether they like/love you or not it frightens them so much they run away.
2. They do not want to be tied down in a monogamous relationship.
3. They aren't looking for anything emotional, just something physical.
4. They don't feel that being in a serious relationship at the current point in their life is what they want.
Those are just sme quesses, but anyone who says that 'all guys mean (insert quote here) when they say they can't be in a relationship', is a liar because all men are different and the answer could be anything.
Hope this helps.
...............................
|
