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What do married men think of women who are friends with his wife, but flirts with him?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Cheating, Marriage problems, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (27 February 2011) 5 Answers - (Newest, 28 February 2011)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

What does a married man really think of a woman that flirts with him? What does he think of her character as a person? Does he really think he can trust someone like that? Especially if he sees that she is friendly with his wife?

View related questions: flirt, married man

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A male reader, Odds United States +, writes (28 February 2011):

Odds agony auntI'm not married, but any person who knowingly flirts with someone who is dating their friend has zero respect in my eyes.

This includes whether they are "just testing me," as one girl claimed after I shot her down (my girlfriend at the time told me this was BS), or are seriously willing to flirt with or steal me from their friend. I wouldn't trust them with my dirty laundry, and I wouldn't give them the time of day.

That said, I'm a judgmental asshole. Some guys may not even notice; others might not care as long as it's within some reasonable limit. It's not an unreasonable view - many guys simply believe that their girlfriend/wife's friends are not to be trusted, anyway, so this might not alter their opinion.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2011):

This is definitely a personal preference sort of thing as it deals with jealousy. I myself am a very loyal guy Id like to think..and while im naturally friendly to other women, I certainly do draw the line. Flirtation is okay but not to be used to play any game with the other person (husband or wife) as long as some rules are relayed and communication is going on, the trust should be established and that sort of thing usually goes alrite. I sense opposite here and should be addressed appropriately. Good luck.

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A female reader, Sincerely Yours United States +, writes (28 February 2011):

Sincerely Yours agony auntI would assume, that if a woman is flirting with him, and she knows he's married, AND IS FRIENDLY WITH HIS WIFE..... that he would have about 0 respect for that woman. He may let her flirt and have fun with it, but I can't imagine he would trust her or think very highly of her. I can't imagine many people would.

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A female reader, SweetSmoochy United States +, writes (28 February 2011):

SweetSmoochy agony auntAgreed with firstlovelastlove. That's not a cool deal. If a woman is friends with another woman who is flirting with her husband, she is either oblivious to it or keeping the friendship in order to keep an eye on that woman. The man, if he is honorable, is not thinking good things about the woman. Even an honorable man is just thinking she's easy tail.

Out of curiosity, why do you ask?

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A male reader, firstlovelastlove Canada +, writes (28 February 2011):

firstlovelastlove agony aunt"What does a married man really think of a woman that flirts with him?" I am engaged but my fiance and I decided I should wear a wedding ring because I used to travel a lot.

"What does he think of her character as a person?" When women flirt with me I rub my nose or cough and use my left hand to cover. If the flirting stops I think 'honest mistake'. If it continues I think the woman has no respect for my fiance and I assume this woman only cares about herself in every sense.

"Does he really think he can trust someone like that?" No way. "Especially if he sees that she is friendly with his wife?" Why would the wife be friends with someone who flirts with her husband? That's just wrong.

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