A
female
age
51-59,
*ottie-tootle
writes:Relationship advice wanted.... i'm in a sexless marriage with a 12 year old child...... there has been no intimacy within the marriage for 8 years but I stay for the sake of the child and because frankly it seems like too much upheaval and upset to up and leave. I've been seeing a married man for 6 months. They have no children, he admits his marriage is far from perfect, has also been sexless for 3 years, yet he doesn't want to upset his wife by leaving. Our relationship has been one of mutual sexual gratification. You can probably guess that I've fallen for him, and I'm now tormented by the situation I've got myself in. What do I do... tell my lover how I feel and risk him ending our relationship... or carry on trying to hide the fact I love him?
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female
reader, i might be a girl but i can help +, writes (20 June 2007):
 well the longer u leave it the worst it will getbut it could be a good thing that this fling might stop than u could go sex counselling maybe u need to get back into ur relationship with ur husband, there still has to be something there for husband he is the one you come home to from work cook dinner make dinner for sleep next to there still is something maybe u could work on that
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2007): Hunny,first of all you should have never cheated or else you wouldnt be in this position. Dont interfere with his marraige because you would regret it forever. You need to call it quits with him and tell your husband before he catches you or its too late. What your doing is wrong and I dont approve neither does Lord Jesus. Much luck!Tommy Lee
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A
female
reader, flower girl +, writes (19 June 2007):
 I can't understand why it is people chose to stay in a sexless marriage for the sake of the children, do you still love your husband? if so maybe sex therapy is a consideration if not do you really think it is fair on any of you to stay, children do get over these things eventually and it would be much better for them if both parents were happy.
Are you scared of being on your own? you dont seem to want to risk telling your lover how you feel in case he ends the relationship so so you are kind of settling for second best in a way.
Maybe you should leave your husband, tell your lover and what will be will be.
Take care.xx.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2007): I believe you have to tell him. Your feelings will become more intense the longer you are with him.You don't say whether your child likes him or not which would be another factor to consider.The fact he wont leave his wife bothers me a little,but then again he is having his cake and eating it so to speak so its no surprise he is happy with the current situation.Find out now what he feels about you being in love with him as if he decides to end it then you know sex was his only reason for being with you so long.Otherwise imagine a year or two down the line if this all comes out you will be devastated more than words can say and that could have a detrimental effect on your child. Hope this helps as my friend was in the same situation and was just being used in the end. Hope this advice is helpful and sorry for being so blunt .
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