A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend have been together for 10 months and both us have been having reacquiring nightmares. His is that i leave him for someone else and mine is that i fall in a hole and he sees me fall and says he is going ot help me get out but instead goes and gets something he wants and leaves me there. What can our dreams mean? please someone help! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (27 January 2013):
Hi there. Yes, I agree with "Fatherly Advice," that dreams very often do have some matching up of circumstances in our daily lives.
Perhaps with your boyfriend's dream, it could be a direct matching up of some lingering doubts he has about you and the relationship.
As in the dream, there may also be a deep seated fear he has that he COULD lose you at some stage, and that you might find someone else.
That might be a direct match of a fear he doesn't even know he has, about you.
Sometimes dreams can be very abstract, and yet they definitely seem to follow a pattern that has a meaning which is very clear to define.
Has your relationship with him, been fairly smooth sailing?
Or do you have some arguments that could easily threaten to potentially end the relationship?
Because if there are no real problems in how you relate to each other, well then this might just be an insecurity that your boyfriend has.
He might be thinking to himself, that things are so good between you, that all of a sudden things might all go wrong and then it ends.
And also that things are so good - perhaps it's too good to be true.
And maybe prior to his relationship with you, he might have had some relationships that ended badly, so at some level he is wondering whether history will repeat itself.
And that is an easy pattern to get into, although very destructive.
And your dream is almost the same thing - like you are being abandoned by him.
And so, you also, might be having some doubts as to whether he will stay with you, and about the future of your relationship.
And being in a hole and can't get out, is of course a feeling of being stuck and nowhere to go.
And the need for someone to help you out of it.
Your dream might not be about the relationship at all.
It could simply be that somewhere in your life, you are stuck and need someone else to help you, and the fact it is your boyfriend in the dream, seems to point towards it being something that in real life does involve him.
And that's why the significance of it being your boyfriend in your dream at the time you fall into this hole, rather than someone else entirely.
And so it seems the stuck feelings you have, do concern your boyfriend as well, in some way.
Another possibility - which is relationship based - could be that you are wondering where the relationship with him is going.
Like, will you end up getting married in the end?
And at the moment you might feel stuck, in not seeing any hint of what the future for you both might hold.
So the "not knowing" might be the feeling of being stuck in a hole.
In other words, uncertainty.
Well, uncertainty about something, anyway.
What often comes in handy when it comes to dreams, is to get a lined exercise book, and write down all the details of the dream - every tiny little detail you can possibly think of, just go on writing all that you can remember of the dream and write until you have covered all that happened.
And this includes the scenery, day or night, hot or cold, sounds (if any), what other people were there in the dream with you. Even if it was just people in the distance, it's still important.
And also the location - work, home, school, away from home in a park, etc.
And then also, what thoughts in the dream were going through your mind while this was happening to you - falling in the hole and then needing help from your boyfriend, and then he goes off and leaves you there.
And as well as your thoughts, also your feelings at the time - fear, anger, worried, sadness, whatever you felt.
I have been recording my dreams for about 11 years now, and I have found many answers there in those dreams, that directly corresponded to whatever was happening in my life at the time.
And if you do this each time after you have woken up the next morning, and straight away write down all that you remember of the dream you had, you will probably start to see some patterns forming that seem to follow a similar set of circumstances each time.
Or at least, similar types of things happening.
There could be slight variations on each dream, although each of them following a very similar theme, just the same.
And then once you have written each dream down, you might be able to think of ways in which the dreams directly correspond to things happening in your daily life at the moment.
It will come to you at different times throughout your day, often quite randomly.
And it probably won't be too difficult to fathom out.
Over a few weeks, you will start to find some clues as you think about what has been happening in your life.
And in a short time, you will probably just suddenly realize what the dream is telling you.
And dreams can send us some very powerful messages while we are asleep, so it's important to listen to them and don't just dismiss them as rubbish.
They can often help us solve some of life's problems, and they do a very good job of it.
Really what dreams are, is our intuition trying to tell us something we need to know, which in our waking hours, we would probably dismiss because we thought we didn't have time to listen.
I guess you could describe dreams, as our inner voice guiding us.
A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (27 January 2013):
 Reoccurring dreams often do have meanings. Some psychologists believe that They are attempts by your subconscious mind to communicate with you. Usually when I have a vivid or reoccurring dream I look up as many symbold from the dream as i can recall. Here are some entries that that match your dreams from my favorite online dream dictionary.
Leaving
To dream that someone is leaving you refers to feelings of rejection or of not being able to keep up.?You are questioning your abilities. Perhaps you are not utilizing your full potential. Alternatively, the dream indicates an end to something; you are ready to let go of the past and move forward.
To dream that you fall into a hole represents a pitfall in some waking situation. You feel you are stuck. Perhaps, you have dug yourself into a hole and cannot get out of it.
FA
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