A
female
age
41-50,
*enispice69
writes:For a few weeks my boyfriend cannot get hard with me and when he does its when I am giving him head and he tries to put it in me and can't get it in on the first time and goes limp.What can I do to keep him hard long enough to have sex?
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female
reader, littlesuziepie +, writes (28 September 2008):
 From expireance and having my own questions answered here I can tell you that he needs to relax. Its probably his fear of failure that he can't pleasure you well enough that causes his rerection to go away. Which is in its self a deviatstion and will be what he is thinking about the next time he goes to perform. He will be thinking it will happenen again. What if it happens again and that will cause such anxiety he won't be able to maintain it.
You really can only reassure him that its ok and if it doesn't work out there are other things you can do as in oral sex.
If your new in the relationship it will get better once he is fully comfortable with you.
Also I know your thinking its you. Your not doing it well or your not attractive but you can't let yourself feel that way. Its more than likely that the issue lays with in his self confidence.
You be strong for both of you and just wait until he is fully able to perform.
Never make a big deal over it as it will only hurt his ego more and prolong the problem.
Read some of my posts and you will see a lot of excellent advise on it. You will also see how hard of a time I had dealing with the situation.
After about 2.5 years of being together my boyfriend learned to have confidence in our sex life and was performing great.
That was when he wasn't masterbating a lot because he did do that and that also hurt our ability to have sex. So he learned to stop that so much as well.
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