A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi i'm sure you get this all of the time but i'm going to ask my question anyway.i really hate my body. i have small breasts (about a b-cup) they used to be bigger (a c cup) and then they shrunk (i lost 30 pounds because i was overweight). they are still perky and a nice shape but i really miss my larger breasts. i used to have lots of attention from guys but i feel like now the attention has stopped. my girl friends tease me about my new small boobs all of the time. they make me feel very self conscious and sometimes i cry when i see myself naked. its very distressing to me. its been this way for about a year. sometimes i am even tempted to gain weight so that theyll grow!! BUT i know that s not a healthy option.so ive been looking into breast implant surgery, and i was wondering how to talk my parents into letting me.. they said i have to do it myself with my own money, when i turn 18... but they also said i cant do it if i live at home, so i have to wait til i move out! i was planning on living here through college because i cant afford to live on my own yet, and if i was living on my own, i definitely couldnt afford breast implants! they cost thousands! so im in a bit of a dilemma... my only options are 1. move out and try to afford college, living costs (food, car etc) AND breast implants all on my own (hard!)2. stay at my parents through college and wait til after i move out to buy them (which will be a LONG time from now, at least 5 years!)3. convince my parents to let me have them while i still live at home..!they are pretty sure that they wont let me do it! my mother said absolutely not, and shes very strict and hard to move on issues she feels strongly about. i even told her that i was depressed because of my body and she just said that most teens are like that but they grow out of it!? i dont know if shes right or not but its no reason for me to suffer so much.i dont know howmuch longer i can live with my small breasts, they are making me VERY depressed. its all that i think about it has been distracting me all through school and exams, my grades have suffered. i worry that i am becoming depressed about it, its very serious problem, really hurting my self esteem. i have even thought of killing myself which i know sounds extreme but im in such a dilemma i cant eat or sleep or focus on anything. someone help me!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Cinder9  +, writes (27 August 2008):
Hey there, I couldn't help but notice your post. You remind me so much of myself when I was younger.Listen, when you are young, kids tease eachother about everything. It happens to everybody. I know you don't believe it and you feel like the pain you are in now will last forever, but I promise you, it won't. I was teased about my hair, my thin face, my crooked teeth, oh yeah, my boobs! (all girls get teased about that one, believe me!), my height, you name it! I remember feeling like everybody was looking at me, noticing what I thought were my faults. I didn't have anybody either to talk to back then (we're talking 1982). If you were my little sister, I'd take you to a fun movie and help you get your mind off of this. Your friends are just being stupid, they don't realize how painful their comments are to you, and if they did, they'd stop. But, really, these things will change in your head, over time. Look at Sharon Stone - beautiful - little boobs. Look at Kate Moss - beautiful - little boobs. Hey, look, you lost some weight, good for you! If you hadn't lost that weight, you could've developed a form of diabetes, and believe me, you'd have more worries! Or high blood pressure, or something else! Listen, I promise you, your feelings will not last forever. Hey look - sometimes I crack up at myself even now - as I'm still a nice looking woman with a great figure - and even now my old insecurities still come back to haunt me when I'm with my boyfriend. Look, your thoughts are normal, they are just out of control, because you are young and trying to figure things out. Hold off on the surgery and concentrate on your school. Believe me, I wish I had somebody to tell me that back then. Focus and finish on your school, that way you can have the money to do what you want later in life - without having to ask anybody! Trust me - I had the surgery and now like millions of other women - I have problems WITH THE SURGERY! One of my boobs is hard like a rock. I hate it, but now I get to deal with that. And I do. I miss my old body and wish I hadn't had the surgery. Listen, you don't know if you will have physical problems with the surgery, but any good doctor out there will not perform the operation if they can tell you are really struggling with your image - like you are right now - seriously believing that the surgery will make you feel great about yourself. Because really, it won't. The doctors know that you will have a rude awakening coming and know you will not be in the right mindset. Wait until you are done with school and can grow up some more and get your mind straight and stronger and see what you are thinking in a few years. And don't go to a cheap doctor, as there are alot of doctors out there (it is unregulated) who should not be performing surgeries, who do botch jobs for real cheap - I'd hate to talk to you after something like that. I promise you, give it time. Things change. And look for all the beautiful small chested girls you see everywhere and notice how great they look. I bet you do too!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2008): a lot of guys will find a woman attractive just based on the fact that shes a female who is comfotable in her own skin.Try to concentrate on appreciating what you do have , for example i take it that your not blind , lame or diagnosed with cancer the list goes on and on yet we as people always seem to focus on what we dont have.Focus on what you do have and live out of apprieciation for these things and your confidence should start to grow. And let me tell you now nothing turns a man on more than a confident women.
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A
female
reader, lexilou  +, writes (24 June 2008):
 First of all your boobs will change many times over your life and they may get bigger all on their own. Mine did.
I considered implants in my late 20's but now I would like a reduction please as they have grown all by themselves to a 34E.
Many women are never truly happy with their bodies, I have been extremely skinny and also overweight and in between too yet never really liked my body. A lot of is about self esteem and confidence rather than what your body really looks like. Im currently in between two dress sizes and would like to drop to the smaller one but I am conmfortable with my body and dress to accentuate the best bits and disguise the bits I am not as happy about.
If you are a b cup then I would say your boobs are not too small and not too big, just right. You can wear clothes that accentuate them including padded bras without being tarty. Learn to live with what you have and make the most of it and maybe see how you feel in a few more years before taking such a drastic step as surgery. God if Id had mine done how enormous would they be now!! x
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A
male
reader, StudentOfLife +, writes (24 June 2008):
 I don't care what you say, I know that you are beautiful. You don't want a man to love you just for your body but for who you are.
Don't change for them, they're not worth the sacrifice. God as everything planned for you, when the day will come you'll find your man no matter your body/breast size.
You don't feel good in your body? Welcome to the crazy society where everyone compares themselves to others. I used to be like that until I saw pictures of celebrities without make-up ... I said to myself "Wow, they're not prettier than me!".
I had lots of weight problem, I didn't think I was pretty but now I think I grew for all of that. I believe that if you wait, you'll grow from that too.
Personally, I don't care about the size of a woman's breast. I look for the size of her smile and how many times she do so. The eyes are also very important to me since I believe they're the mirror of the soul.
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A
male
reader, Wulfgrimm +, writes (24 June 2008):
I find smaller "perky" and well shaped beasts more attractive. I am not into huge boobs, because one they just arn't all the atractive, and two women start to have back trouble as the breast size goes up... which just isnt cool.
As for breast implants? Hell no! I hate implants and I would not date a women that had them. And yes you can tell when they are fake.
Dont be so focused on breasts, most men look at other things as well. Legs, belly, face, smile, eyes, etc. I bet your Gorgeous in your own way, and I dont think you should change that.
As for me I am a face guy, first thing I notice is if they have a cute face.
-Cris
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A
female
reader, XxAnGelXxx +, writes (24 June 2008):
 A B cup is really not that bad! Your boobs are still bound to change, as people have said, i know it'll be hard and you obviously don't see the point or cant, but stop feeling so negative about your body, embrace it! Try looking online for style guides on what'll enhance what You've got, and other ways of enlarging your boobs without surgery, I've heard that massaging them for 10 minutes a day stimulates the growth of the tissue or something but im not too sure, you'll have to look it up, get a good bra! A good fitting one what pushes it all up a bit to get that fuller effect! Heck even use 'chicken fillits' if you want to make them look bigger? But boobs aren't everything, like i said embrace what you do have! As for your friends, tell them that your fed up of their childish teasing and if one has a big nose or something don't be afraid to tell them! Lol x
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A
male
reader, SilentWind  +, writes (24 June 2008):
I have no idea what is "b" cup size is (?) "they" will make fun of you if you have b-cup, "they" will make fun if you have large boob, "they" will make fun if you had no boob at all. It is the law of weakness to make fun and to disgrace another. You dont try to be even with them and at best to ignore them.Wait a minute! you are not even 18? I do not know what mental state you are in, but if you are over-pouring with anger, do not talk! Do not even think or make any decision in that Miss Angry state! Let three four days pass by, maybe a month and see the different mental state you will be in. If i were you, i will work on my self, read read read and love my parents
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2008): it seems like your still young they will grow.and u will change over years.your age is still getting bigger and so are u and your boobs
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (24 June 2008):
 It is regonized at least in Holland that for some people this issue is so strong that breast implants are actually re-funded by the insurance company if a shrink says it is necessary for the patients mental health.
Obviously this means that in some cases even the pro's can't tell a person that they are fine as they are and they don't need to go under the knife to feel better about themselves.
Nonetheless, here are two little bits of information for you from a male.
Most males like breasts, ANY SIZE, a b-cup is a nice average especially if they are as you say a nice shape and perky. In fact lots of males have a preference for "smaller" breasts.
Then there is the fact that almost ALL men HATE breast implants. Although they might have gotten better you can feel the difference even if the scars don't make it bloody obvious.
So who are you doing this for? For your own self-image, because it won't all of sudden make you more attractive except to the wrong kind of people (do you want someone who is just after big tits or after you the person?).
Will having bigger tits really make you feel better about yourself? As I said in the opening, for some people this is the case. So be it, but I would recommend you first try other means then going under the knife of trying to feel better about yourself.
Try to see if you can get counseling for your self-image. In any case, at least wait till you are older, your breasts are not yet finished developing and you are at a very difficult stage of your life in the first place.
If you had it done now what do you think the reaction at school would be? Girl doesn't come to school for a week, and when she comes back she has gone up a size. Sure, those wonderful girlfriends you got won't make you feel miserable about that.
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A
female
reader, Tremor  +, writes (24 June 2008):
 I really doubt that having a B cup is something worth worrying about, let alone considering suicide over. I do know where you are coming from - I'm only an A cup myself, and it can be a little disheartening at times, but you need to realize that boobs aren't that important, especially once you leave high school. If you were only getting attention from guys because of your chest, I doubt those are the kind of guys you want attention from anyway.
Stop focusing on it - the size of your boobs is NOT an issue. If it's bothering you so much, perhaps invest in a decent push up or some 'chicken fillets'. I wouldn't encourage you to get implants - be proud of what you are. Focus on the positives - perhaps you have a nice ass, a good set of legs, or a gorgeous face. Or better yet, a cute laugh, a cracking sense of humour, or a nice personality. Remember that it's not all about the physical.
If you are really really dead set on getting cut open and having some silly bits of silicone stuck into you, then wait. You are a teenager, you're still growing and you're full of hormones. Wait AT LEAST a few years and then see how you feel. Your mother is right when she says that most teens grow out of this.
Good luck to you, and remember to focus on the positive!
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