A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:HiMe and my girlfriend have been together for nearly 3 years now. I'm 17 and so is she. We split up a while ago and it was agonising. It didn't get any easier and we both wanted each other back, so we got back together. It's a few months on now and I am doubting us. She broke up with me last time and I know how horrible it is and I don't want to put her through that! I'm just not happy with her. The thing is, is the fact that I have developed feelings for another girlm, and I think this is also having the effect on me wanting us to break up. I'm finding it really hard not to flirt with her and feel really guilty afterwards, but I can't help myself. I don't want to get with her straight away, but i'm just confused on whether I should stay with my gf. I think she is really happy with our relationship at the minute so i don't want to hurt her.any help appreciated.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your responses. That's some good advice, and yes I do think that I have got feelings for this other girl because me and my gf have left our new and honeymoon period. I will have to find a way to sit down and talk to her. thanks again.
A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (12 September 2007):
 So why aren't you happy? What is causing you to be unhappy? Is it because the beginning romantic phase is gone. The innocent flirting you had with her has disappeared. It sound as if you're looking for the feeling you get when you're flirted with and when you flirt back. I'm glad you feel guilty and have the thought you do about not hurting your girlfriend. There are so many people who would just do what they want without taking into consideration the feelings of those they hurt. I commend you for that, it's a great quality to be growing up with.
I want you to talk to your girlfriend. Tell her how you love the fact she is so happy, but you feel as if your relationship has gotten stuck in a rut. If after talking to her, you can't come up with something different to do to change this, then she may not be the one for you. Don't just leave because the flirting is fun, and it's nice having someone show interest, if you do it won't be long with the new girl that the same feelings of being in a rut will return.
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A
male
reader, Tommy7 +, writes (12 September 2007):
Both of you have a disconnect between reality and fantasy. Eventually you'll both learn that reality says walk away and don't come back.
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