A
male
,
anonymous
writes: My girlfriend and me have been dating a while. Well everytime we hang out she seems to always want me to do something sexual to her like finger her. But when it comes to me she dosen't like to do anything like give me head because she doesn't think she will do it right. How can I get her to do more? I don't expect it all the time just everyone and a while. Any suggestions? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2007): dont give her your finger.............better yet start teasing her by putting yourself infront of her, sure she give in....
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2006): She doesnt have much confidence. You need to encourage her, and assure her that she will do it right. If you tell her this, she should be more willing. If, when she does go ahead, you are still unsatisfied, guide her, tell her how she can please you. Then she will feel more confidnet about doing it right, cos you will have told her how to.
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A
female
reader, Evangeline +, writes (27 October 2006):
This is a difficult subject to tackle as you obviously care about her and don't want to offend her or pressure her. Even if she feels awkward or shy about pleasuring you, relationships are equal and it is not wrong for you to want something in return. But make sure you tread carefully, you dont want it to escalate into something that may harm the relationship.
You could start the ball rolling by having intimate text conversations; you tell her for example you 'love making her wet' or that you 'love touching her'. If you text her in a meaningful way, it will make her more confident. You could then tell her how touching her turns you on and for example how it makes you want her. When you feel comfortable enough, you could start telling her what you want her to do in a light hearted way, if you do it right its a fun way of communicating over these issues, for example don't say something like 'you've got to give me a handjob' you could word it more like 'i get so turned on when I think about you touching me down there'.
Its important however, to make her feel comfortable about herself and what you are doing - dont pressure her it only makes it worse. Its also best not to avoid confrontation about these things especially early on in the relationship as it can make things worse.
Good luck
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