A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey guys wondering whether I could have some help.After finishing a bad relationship 2 years ago, I bump into a friend from school i haven't seen in years. We end up getting on really well and going out on a few dates, all of which have been amazing.She seems to have her guard up and has told me that i'm too young for her (im 2 months younger than her both 23, her 2 previous boyfriends were 42 and 46). I'd like to say I am mature for my age acheiving a lot more than most people at my age. Do I persevere or do I take that as she's not interested? Her body language and everything she says when we're together apart from this one thing about being too young suggests otherwise. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (21 December 2016):
 If she is telling you that you are to young then it is probably because she prefers dating older men. You can try and woo her and turn around her decision, the only danger with that is in case you fall for her and then end up hurt. It is your choice if you should take that risk or not.
A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (17 December 2016):
 I am a great believer in taking notice of what people DO, as opposed to what they SAY. She may be saying you are too young for her (she obviously has a thing for older men), but she is enjoying her time with you and is still going out with you (I assume).
Women/girls go for older men when they want experience, financial stability and to be treated well. She is telling you that you are not her type but her previous two boyfriends, both her "type", have not worked out.
In your shoes, in a quiet moment, I would ask her why she has a thing about older men, whether your age is a deal breaker for her and, if so, why she is still dating you. Don't do it in an accusatory way, just in a genuine "out of interest" way, and see what she says. It is possible she is a gold digger and wants someone older so she can enjoy the lifestyle being with them will bring. She could be just killing time with you until she meets another older man, in which case, for your own dignity and sanity, you need to wish her well and leave her to her search.
However, you may have confused her totally about what she wants from a partner and a relationship. She may have believed she wanted an older bloke and then you came along, her age, and she enjoys being with you.
You two need a serious heart-to-heart to find out where she is coming from and where you are both going.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (17 December 2016):
 Sounds like she prefers men older in age not necessarily mature. She's not interested so I'd give this one a miss and find somebody who will appreciate you as you are.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (17 December 2016):
 I'd wish her well and stop wasting any more time on her. If she rather date older men, you can't really compete.
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