A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Sorry this question isn't really dating related...but I used to come here years ago before I got married and couldn't think of any other advice columns. I will keep it short.Wedding etiquette... we're going to be in Florida late winter for a friend's wedding...is it rude to schedule a family pics session (for our family) while we're down there if it will detract from the time we'd spend at the resort? We live up north in the deep snow and just would like some maternity pics outdoors ...but up here we'd have to wait until late spring and that's too late. I've never been to a formal style wedding before so unsure on the unspoken rules. We're paying for our own trip.Thank you! I promise to answer some actual relationship questions while I'm here!
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (21 December 2016):
 As long as you are not planning it for there wedding day then I don't see the problem. If it is not taking you as guests away from anything planned for there wedding then no harm.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2016): I think if you are paying for your transport, accommodation, present from the wedding list etc...then it's hardly rude. As long as you don't miss something they've paid for such as a dinner or whatever then carry on and treat it as a weekend away.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (18 December 2016):
 Unless there is a full program for the entire weekend with NO time set aside for personal time, then I don't see how it could be improper. Don't do it when there is something on the program, such as dinner, or another event that you are expected to participate in. But surely, for a full weekend, there's scheduled private time so people will be allowed to catch their breath. Do it during one of those times.
Example, before evening dinner there is usually an open time slot for 2-4 hours. Or, before/shortly after breakfast. Around noon would probably be difficult, as that's the most popular time to do a guest-event.
I would hold on booking a photographer until I had seen the program and knew if it'd be possible to squeeze in or not. Some people have extensive programs, while others just want to make a weekend out of it and leave the day open for guests to do whatever they want, and only gather again in the evening. So it really depends on the program.
If you haven't received a program yet, ask for it! It's not proper to invite people to a full weekend event with no program, so if you haven't gotten one already, they're probably just running late with getting it printed out. But there should be a pdf or a word-file she would be able to send you over e-mail. If she asks why you want it, say you need it to plan what to bring. It's only natural that you'd like to know what's going to happen.
If it's still a long way ahead, I say wait with booking a photographer until the last minute. See if you will get the program first without having to ask for it. Then as time closes up for when you'll need to do the booking, if you still haven't received a program, you can ask for it and say you need it in order to start your own planning for what to bring etc since you have your entire family with you.
But no, as others have said, you CAN NOT do the photography when there is something on the program. You can't just skip something that is planned and prepared for the wedding guests, that would be improper and would just be rude.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (17 December 2016):
 I don't see anything wrong with catching up with family stuff while you are in Florida for a wedding. As Honeypie has already suggested, plan to stay an extra day or two to make sure your timings and schedules don't clash. Have fun!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (17 December 2016):
 Most people pay their own way as far as transport cost. I'd suggest you consider arriving a day before or stay and extra day and do your personal photo shoot then. I DO think it's a little inappropriate to do it over the PLANNED wedding week-end.
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