A
female
age
30-35,
*ii3RN3Ybbs.
writes:okay wellll..........when i was little, i lived with my nan bekoz my mum wasa single mum, my dad walked out, so my mum was tryna raise me.koz when i was living with her, she tried 3 suicidal attemps infront of my face.+ i was too young to understand but growing up now i realized.we never had the relationship that childreen have with there mums now, and you no what i wish i did.:/finally i moved back in with my mum when i was 7 she met my step dad when i was 7 and a half.+ my mum was so happy and i nevr wanted to ruin that, koz things picked up from there.Then my stepdads brother, .. Rayped me :'/ + i didn't say anything since last year.bEkoz i never wanted to ruin my mums happiness, and i fault we could finally be a family.Then i couldn't hold it in any longer, so i told them last year, my court case just finished, never went to court koz not enough evidence. :/Bbutt now my mums told me, i don't love lee anymore, [After 7 years they've been together, and my life finally nearly close to looking up ] she said she lost feelings for him when the court case started, which i knew that'd happen.just bekoz what happend to me, ruined everything.now my mum wants to be with this other man, he has a wife that he's told he doesn't love anymore.+ we're moving, and then a year after, we've moving in with him, which i don't even knoe if it's gonna work with them. and my whole life disaster will start all overr again ;/It's so arkward in my house now, knowing my mum doesn't love my stepdad anymore.it's not a family.i just really need advice :( Please. x Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Tii3RN3Ybbs. +, writes (7 December 2009):
Tii3RN3Ybbs. is verified as being by the original poster of the question I spoke to her tonight.
all she had too say was sorry :/
Butt hoepfully thing will look uppp x
A
female
reader, fishdish  +, writes (7 December 2009):
 do you have any aunts/ uncles/other grandparents you might be able to stay with while she sorts it all out? I think I would tell her that if she's going to leave your stepfather, fine, you know, you will support her, but you don't want to be part of making your stepdad look like a fool. sorry i don't have more advice.
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A
female
reader, Tii3RN3Ybbs. +, writes (7 December 2009):
Tii3RN3Ybbs. is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI Left school.
because my court case started effecting school.
+ i missed so much i wasn't going to get the right grades.
+ i didn't want to fail.
so now im going too start college early.
+ my nan sadly passed away, so my mum got worse.
& saying that to my mum will make her upset.
and i don't want her to keep secrets from me.
she only just toldd me these passt couple of months :( x
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A
female
reader, Angzw  +, writes (7 December 2009):
well done for nailing the loser. As for your mum, just don't involve yourself in her business. Let her make her decisions as she sees fit. I know its hard to be caught in the middle of all this deception but maybe its better to tell your mum you don't want to know details about her love life. Is it not possible to ask your Gran if you can move in with her while your mum sorts out her life? At your age you need stability and i can understand why this is so hard for you. Also try talk with a couselor at school to help you through all these issues
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A
female
reader, Tii3RN3Ybbs. +, writes (7 December 2009):
Tii3RN3Ybbs. is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBut thing is,
i think she's thinking about herself in the situation.
:/
Like, she's telling me everything about her "new guy"
+ theres me feeling arkward when im with my step dad, because he's spent SO much on her this christmas, and she's going behind his back.
and and the end of the day if this "new guy " hurts my mum, i have to pick up the peices again.
and i jsut can't do it anymore :'( x
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (7 December 2009):
 none of this is your fault. I am glad you had the courage to tell your mother about the rape, I am equally glad she was a strong loving mother who is there for you.
You and I, we cant be sure why your mother has decided to end her marriage, yes, what happened to you might have contibuted a little bit, but we dont know for sure what goes on or what is said when we are not there when they are, so probably there was a lot going on in the marriage and this situation has just hastened the end of it.
A lot of kids dont have the sort of upbringing and family life that we all see on our TVs, and you will realise that as you get older. Some of us have happier childhoods than others, and some of us come out a little more unscathed than others.
There are also lots of kids who are not raised by their parents, but grandparents, or uncles or aunts or even older brothers and sisters. This doesnt mean the love is not there, nor does it mean you are not a family.
From the little you have said about her your mother sounds like a strong gutsy girl! As long as you and she can talk to each other, and love each other I think you will be okay.
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