A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i have been married to my husband for 5 years now and we've been together for 10 years.Being together for so long we both are bonded and have a totally amazing secure relationship.Sex is great but i have not experienced other men and he had sex with one girl before me and that's it.Sometimes when i get drunk i get flirtatious, dance on the pole and act really wild.I think i have been thinking alot about a threesome lately.Everytime i'm having sex with my husband i imagine my self making out with a girl infront of him and even him making out with another girl and me video taping them etc and these thoughts turn me on so much.I wouldn't consider myself as bisexual but just curious.Few days back my husband and i went to a club witha group of people and there there was this very attractue girl with us,we were a little drunk and my husband hugged her from the back really tightly and danced like that with her for couple of minutes or so.I'm surprized at myself as I didn't feel jealous at all but enjoyed watching them and even took a few pictures.Next moring my husband saw those pictures. It seemed like he was bit embarrassed by it and was going to delete them but i told him not to and that they are cute.Another time i was at a club and danced in the middle of two gay guys sexually(rubbing bodies) almost like i wanted a threesome.So anyways i have been showing signs but never talked about my fantasy for a threesome with him but then something really strange happened couple of days back.One of my friend was over at out our place and we both were just drinking and dancing and being silly.she ended up staying over at our place and when my husband and i went to bed that night we both were drunk and making out and then he asked me if i kissed my girl friend "K". i was totally turned on by that comment.i said no and then he said i can see you want it and then suggested to invite her in the room. i was sooo happy to hear that coming from him and asked him if he really means it, he said yes both times and i went and asked my friend not directly but just asked if she's ok and wants me to sleep with her.Anyways nothing happened that night she said no thankyou and i went back to our room.but now my question is what is everyone's thoughts on this? i have been thinking even more about a threesome now since my husband indicated an interest too.I get so wet just by thinking about it and i'm happy we are on the same page with this.It looks like i wont get jealous because i didn't when he hugged that girl infront of my eyes and it didn't bother me at all when he asked to invite my friend into the room.Since we've been together for so long i feel very secure in y relation ship and i dont think anyone can take him away from me and since we both have little experience with others i think it will be soo o exciting and spice things up.I would prefer answers from those who have experienced a three some.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2010): thanks for the post but what did you mean when you said your wife didn't realize how attracted you were to other women? and what made you guys decide it's not for you two.what emotions did you go through later if it was so great.could you explain a little more?
A
male
reader, Ven +, writes (9 November 2010):
Talk about with your husband. Have a serious discussion about what you both want, and go from there. If you decide to have a 3-way, talk about it a week later. A month later. Let me give my story as an example:
My wife was way more open to the idea of a MMF romp than I realized. Being a guy, my physical urges go off the chart for that kind of action. My culture tells me it's the greatest thing possible. My religion on the other hand tells me to be faithful to my wife. So when my wife had zero problems with it, I decided that her approval meant nothing was wrong with it. I had a great time.
After a few weeks, the shine faded somewhat, and I felt all kinds of emotions. I felt like my wife didn't realize how attracted I was to other women, and that sex became more mechanical. Eventually we talked and decided that it just wasn't for us.
Anyhoo, if the two of you can make it work that is awesome (you will have fun!). But just know that it is a can of worms, and the more openly you communicate with each other the more you keep the problems contained.
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