A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:There's a guy who I know and I've seen around a few times who is sort of like a friend of friends. We've had each other on Facebook for around 3 years but have never actually got to know each other properly, until recently. In short- he is in the army, based around 300 miles from where I live (his hometown too) so he's not been home very often. Two months ago, he was back home for a couple of weeks and we bumped into each other on a night out. He came over and we had a short "long time no see"- esque conversation. Later that night he sent me a message on Facebook saying how it had been nice to see me tonight etc! And from this we swapped numbers. A few days later he went back to Afghanistan for 7 weeks.While he was in Afghanistan he had his iPad and we spoke every single day, pretty much a seven week conversation. Long, flirty messages. We spoke around 3-4 hours a night on average. It was established that we liked each other and he came up with plans for us for when he was back from Afghanistan and invited me to go with him to all these festivals he was going to. He definitely really liked me and obviously enjoyed talking to me! We were speaking as if we were going to start seeing each other. Up to about a week ago.He got back to the uk on Monday, back to our hometown yesterday. He is back in our hometown for 8 weeks. I've barely heard from him in the past week and all these plans we had seem long forgotten! He hasn't even TOLD me he's back in our hometown- I haven't heard from him now for 3 days. (When he got back to the uk he text me but then just stopped replying). He hasn't seen me to change his mind about things, and I'm 99% positive I haven't said anything that would scare him off. I've seen on Facebook he's been out with his friends and he obviously has his phone with him etc... I don't understand. It's genuinely like he just suddenly stopped talking to me overnight! I don't want to say anything to him because I don't want to seem crazy but we talked so much while he was away, I grew to really like him and now I'm left feeling pretty disappointed :(. I get that he has friends and family to catch up with but how can you go from speaking to someone so much daily to nothing at all, just like that?! :(
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2014): Men tend to do this when they are away for an extended period of time. In the future, never give a man that much of your time. There is no mystery at all left. Ya'll talked for 3 hours a night? You basically showed him your life revolved around him and you have no life of your own. He may not even realize that is what has happened. There is no thrill of the chase. You were too available..period. Look that up and find out more about it. I hope you take heed to that in the future. And always put yourself first.
A
male
reader, wise-guy +, writes (2 May 2014):
I really feel for you sweetheart! Because I've been in this awful situation before. I spoke to this girl all the time and it was lovely. We'd text, Facebook, phone each other and even meet up. I thought she was the one. I still regret it now. She just slowed down talking, we talk now but it's not the same!!
Maybe you were a bit of fun or emotional company whilst away?? Which is so wrong if that's the case :( ohh I feel for you. I understand that trapped cut off feeling you're having
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