A
male
age
41-50,
*monty78
writes:To start off, let me tell you I am sending this from my cell phone. So I apologize for mispunctuation LOL. I'm going to make this to the point the best I can. December of 07 I start seeing a girl, never knowing she will end up being the girl I never want to live without. We fell in love and because of my business kept me so busy, she and her daughter moved 40 miles to be with me in June of 08. She had trouble finding a job here, which led to financial problems as well as, I willingly admit, my mother didn't help things out. So we both decided to move back with our folks 6 months later and we would get another place in a few months and get married in the summer. Well, a month after we moved she left me, right after the holidays, and said maybe when we both are in a better place in our lives we could get back together. That was in January. We remained friends but it was too tough on my heart because I loved her so much. I cut contact with her in mid February and at the end of March she called out of the blue to get the rest of her stuff from me. When she came I tried to get her back and she was very adament that there was no chance of it. I decided it was time to try and get over her. She then called me In early may and made a lame excuse to contact me. I was cordial but didn't let my feelings get my hopes up. Two weeks later she called and asked to use my business as a job reference. A week later she did the same thing for another job she applied for. Now she just calls here and there for random silly things and I admit I do the same. I am very much still in love with her and wonder if she is having some second thoughts and is just not telling me. She never says anything of great significance to let me know, other than occasionally saying she misses my girls or once she said she missed our house.I want to reconcile and sweep her off her feet again without looking desperate or in a hurry. How do I do this?She's all I want in life.....still, 6 months later.Btw.....I am 30, she will be 28 next week.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2009): I think she still has feelings for you. Based on my experience and the girls I know..you really don't bother to call up someone especially your ex whom you've been separated with if you don't have feelings for him anymore. I think you still have a good chance to win her back.
A
female
reader, marietomates +, writes (4 July 2009):
 Okay, here's a woman's perspective. She's either calling you because she's bored and she knows you'll give her attention, or she's truly into you again. I can't honestly say because I don't know you or her. If you really want her back talk to her like a man, ask her what her plans are next Friday and take her out for drinks, be a gentleman, see what happens. Don't be clingy, don't be over-attentive, don't act insecure. Figure out if you think you two are in a better place and equally want to have a go at it again. It won't work if you're the only one who wants it. You're just going to get hurt in the long run if all she wants is attention and nothing more. Find out, and good luck!
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