A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:So i started this new relationship about 3 months ago with a girl. Things went fast between us, but at times she was still emotionally disturbed and attached to her ex who was a complete ass to her. But she had 2 kids together with him, so it was hard completely staying away too. I understood. Things got rough between them and they ended up in court. Because of all this our relarionship took a toll too. She said she loved me alot, but as she was emotionally disturbed didnt want to be with me all the time. She would txt email or call me most of the time during the day. Then i found out she had been having random sex every now n then with random people. When i asked her she said this is how she copes up and heals. And said she didnt want to just "fuck" me as there was a lot of emotion between us. She still tells me she loves me and wants to start afresh relationship with me once she heals. But this is ridiculous .. how can I be ok knowing she is sleeping with random men frequently ... i decided to end things .. she is heart broken and cries alot but still has random sex ... i dont know what to do ....
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male
reader, Billy Bathgate +, writes (1 May 2017):
Run and don't look back. Block her on all your social media and block her number so that she cannot text you.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2017): End it and completely cut all contact. You may want to get tested for HIV and full infection panel completed. Even if you used condoms each and every-time; it's a good idea to get tested in-case of an unnoticed rip or micro-tear.
Just telling her she needs help is basically telling her what she already knows. She doesn't want to seek professional-help, but prefers handling it her way. Once you know you're clean of any type of STD infection; cut all ties. Have nothing else to do with her.
Technically/legally, if you know someone is mentally-unstable or suffering from a mental-disorder and incapable of reasonable judgement; it could be argued that sex with her was non-consensual. It was only a brief connection with her; so it shouldn't be that difficult to break it off.
Seek legal advice if she becomes a stalker or persistently attempts to reach you at work.
Be sure that you don't cave-in under sympathy. There are far too may bad ways this could turn-out.
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A
female
reader, This_is_not_a_dress_rehearsal +, writes (1 May 2017):
 This woman needs professional help. Thank God you're out of there, count your blessings, walk away and don't look back. Yes it's sad she's had terrible coping skills, but she's the one that needs to get the help not you.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (1 May 2017):
 Cut the contact, OP
You can't fix her by being a "good" BF or person. She is, like she said, "disturbed". She was putting YOUR health and the kids' safety at risk with her behavior and she really doesn't care.
You two were ONLY an "item" for 3 months. While there might have been a LOT of excitement and drama... Don't be fooled that she will be OK in no time and you two can pick up where it left off. This woman carries some DEEP DEEP issues. Issues SHE really needs a good therapist to deal with. She can't go out and have random sex and think it will "cure" her and make her whole again.
Wish her well and let her know you are cutting the contact 100% and moving on. There is JUST too much drama here, not to mention messed up family dynamics, trust issues etc.
And go down and have an STD panel done, one now and one in 6 months (or whatever your doctor recommend) If she has sex with TOTAL strangers who knows what kind of STD's she can have exposed herself and YOU to.
You said it yourself, OP:
"But this is ridiculous"
So STOP being part of her crazy circus.
Her poor kids...
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