A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I broke up with my boyfriend of 6 1/2 years 2 months ago because I was tired of him not having any goals (no GED, dead-end job) and he was never affectionate towards me. Once we broke up we still talked about he was affectionate but it felt so forced. 1 month after we broke up he proposed to me and I said no because I knew that getting engaged (even though I wanted to say yes so bad) wouldn't get the things that I want.Now 2 months later I am talking with this other guy that I meet right after me and my boyfriend broke up (he knows he's the rebound and I am not looking for anything serious, just fun) and my ex is seeing this girl also. And now he is affectionate towards her, he got his GED and got a job that he can make into a career. So, she gets all the things that I wanted for so long!My question is: Do you think he is doing this to show me he can be all the things that I want him to be or is he really moving on?
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female
reader, hlskitten  +, writes (8 August 2008):
 Rebound relationships are never moving on in my opinion. They're just co dependant people that need someone, anyone in there life even if its just for sex. Unless of course the relationship has been dead to the one moving on for quite some time before splitting.
So the fact you both jump into bed so quick with other people after you split, just seems to say none of you are ready. I didnt use to be very tactile with my kids dad, he didn't mind, he knew i loved him. No one is perfect. Maybe you're not very tolerant and are expecting perfection?
C xxxxx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2008): I'm not saying your not wonderful - because you most likely are - but sometimes people just feel so in love with someone that they just light up. You were with him for so long and after a certain amount of time things do die down.
When someone feels so fantastic their life changes and everything goes shooting up.
Its unlikely, I'm sorry to say, that he is showing you anything. Its likely that hes propelled himself way out of your life, totally moving on and is so much happier with someone else.
As for you, you can still find that person that will make you feel as fantastic as she is making him. I know its not exactly what you wanted to hear, but there is someone out there that will be like that when your ready. Then your life can go rocketing up just like his is now.
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